A mole's behind

3. Jealousy and a broken nose

You can skip this chapter if you want to avoid triggers, I give a quick summary at the beginning of the next.

-------- TW violence, jealousy

POV Iskall

He was shivering slightly, his skin still warmer than the cold, damp evening air. Grian still hadn't said much. No thoughts, no answer, nothing. What if that hug was just a hug? What if after all, Grian wasn't OK with him being OK with Grian liking Mumbo? Iskall's head stumbled on the confusing sentences his brain pieced together. The situation was indeed confusing.

Him and Grian were so different from him and Åke. Maybe his rushed decision to confront him was a mistake. It had felt so right, though.

Flashback
The cracking sound was barely audible, but it drowned out the noise around him.
This couldn't, he didn't... but the blood on her face left no room for denial. 

Unfreezing, he acted without thinking. He pushed Åke aside placing himself between them. "Are you mental?!" He shouted, not taking his eyes off the face beneath the untidy blond fringe.
The lips were a thin and angry line, the eyes wide open in shock. Åke scrambled to his feet, then ran off. Iskall wasted no thought on him and instead turned around to face the girl who now covered her nose with her hands, a drop of blood running over her knuckles as she tried to keep it from going everywhere.

"Are you injured?" His heart was still pounding from adrenaline.
"Yes." She drew a breath through her mouth. "My nose hurts like hell."

He needed to do something. His thoughts were racing. How could Åke do this? Not the time to think about this now, someone was bleeding.

"I'm so sorry. I don't know what's gotten into him."

What to do now? An ambulance? No, too much, it wasn't urgent.
"Should I take you to a doctor? Your nose might be broken, you should have it looked at."

He paused. "Or do you want me to call the police?"

End of flashback 

Grian was nothing like Åke. Did this mean he would understand Iskall? Him and Åke had eventually broken up over this. It wasn't as if Iskall had even been flirting with anyone. Not even with the girl who ended up filing a police report over her broken nose. They'd just exchanged a few words about the song that was playing and - as he must've told his former boyfriend about a million times - he really wasn't into girls anyway.

He'd sworn to himself never to be like Åke and so far, it had really seemed all too easy.

A/N: This is actually very hard for me to write. I've never been in this situation myself, on neither side. So, I've never been jealous nor have experienced someone being overly jealous towards me. I know it sounds weird, since I am (and very much live) polyamorous.

Going to meetups and such, I've heard many times that jealous partners and overly strict rules played a huge role in people's journey to polyamory. I tried to incorporate some of this here, I might have gone (or will be going) a bit over the top.

A common story is, that a person notices in their relationship that they also fall in love with someone else. Believing the monogamous story, they break up with the first person and start a relationship with the second. But the pattern repeats and whatever relationship they are in never lasts for long, even though they might want it to last. Sometimes people cave in and cheat on their partners instead of breaking up because they want to keep the relationship going. I mean, they're in love, of course they want to stay with the person they love. This might also lead to people forcing themselves to ignore their feelings. People might feel like something's wrong with them and develop self-hatred.

Once they discover alternative relationship models, these feelings often change to relief and a feeling of freedom, but also stronger love, since they can have a partner in whom they trust without having to hide or deny a part of themselves.

I personally know many of these positive feelings. But my journey was more along the lines of healing past trauma and a general attitude of breaking societal rules if I don't understand them. So yeah, Iskall has kinda been making my point earlier: 

Do I have to feel jealous? Cause I just don't.

So, my question for the day is:
If you are/have been in a relationship: Have you experienced jealousy? How does it feel for you? 

If you aren't/haven't been: Do you want jealousy to be a part of a relationship? Do you think it is necessary to some extent?

And also: does anyone even read these little rants? :'D