my uwu life

your scare part 6

*themes of gore, suicide, death, uwu, qwq, ext...*

*you know the drill read with caution*

it was cold as i walked and everything felt like it was a metaphor. the ideas swarming around in my head and the warm winds with a bitter bite did the same. the scarf wrapped my face, trying to stop the winds, only made my neck feel hot and my eyes stinging unable to adjust to the winds. making the scarf the home and the wind the past, they worked in good and bad ways, but either way it hurts more than helps.

but i ignored it trying to focus on my thoughts as i walked through the cold. it wasn't even cold it was just windy but it was annoying. and i couldn't shake my bad thoughts as i remembered all of hizashi's warning signs. then many things he would do before breaking down...

 i thought and i thought more, trying desperately to find out what was happening with the clues i was given. i felt like a detective but i was missing the biggest piece. i didn't listen when he tried to talk.

my mind was running wild as i made a turn back to the house. thinking and muttering to myself, ignoring all eyes that watched my quiet panic. looking around at mental notes i made to myself i started to run.

shaking my head and breaking out in a sprint i couldn't leave him alone what was i thinking! i scolded myself over and over as i remembered the signs i skipped over. i thought it was because we were moving. i thought it was the get lag. i wanted so desperately not to think about it i completely cut it out of my thought process.

closing my eyes as they were no help in my desperate sprint to his house. feeling freer as the wind wasn't  attacking my line of sight constantly i ran faster. faster and faster yet i continue to pump my fists forward and my legs swinging in rhythm. 

hearing myself push past the crowd as they moved for me. their chatter opening my eyes in a frantic attempt to get them to stop. slowly stopping my run as i made it to the door. the crowd which was closer now, surrounding me demanding answers.

opening the door and hissing at them yelling and demanding over their own. making most of them leave i took it and want inside. closing the door quietly and locking it i look to the kitchen table. rebekah was still there humming along with her phone and texting happily. 

not wasting my time with questions knowing she didn't move from her spot. making my way upstairs quickly as i rumble with the door trying desperately to open it. banning on the door and still trying to open it i cry out, "hizashi!?"

the familiar smell of blood wafted to my nose as i looked down. on the wood floor board there was a small trail of blood. the house was on a tilt and the room was small, but to see that still means he lost alot of blood.  sending waves of panic i couldn't think i just busted the door down on instinct. standing there for a moment as the smell of blood attacked me.

looking down at the trail of blood and following it up to the bed shocked and trying to get my body to move to him. keeled over the side of the bed. your arms draping over the side of it. pale arms from the loss of blood, hanging low preparing themselves for their death bed. blood lacing your fingers before going to the pool beneath you. the gash was messy and running path with his other scars as it split his arm in a messy tear.

 taking off my coat i run to you holding up your almost lifeless body. your eyes roiling to me looking shocked just before rolling to the back of your skull. moving the knife out of your arm trying to ignore how deep it was. wrapping his arm with my thick scarf i hoped it would suffice.

picking up hizashi's phone and moving out of the chat and called 911. frantically telling them the address and how his arm was cut. listening to her direction i pushed on his arm trying to keep it from bleeding further.

holding onto him and crying into his arm not wanting to move afraid that i would let it blead more. trying to stop my sniffling and weeping i picked you up bridal stile and walked you down to the front door. holding you in my arms trying my best not to break down as i held you.

my clothes drenched in blood and making a trail behind me from laying by your side i pushed it all away. just worried about you as the ambulance sirens were growing near. your eyes squinted harshly before looking up at me. your weaker eye couldn't open and you were barely looking at me. taking your left unharmed arm you traced my cheek moving a tear from it. looking down to you and nuzzling your hand not wanting to say anything just wanting him to be ok.

smiling weakly as your body couldn't do anymore with out struggling. your hand falling back down as the last of your strength left your body. my eyes going wide and spilling more tears i held him to my chest making  sure he was still breathing. seeing the ambulance arrive i quickly run to them.

opening their doors and taking him from my arms quickly. one of them were talking to me but i couldn't hear it i was watching hizashi being taken from me. turning his head he mouths to me, "love you." trying to run to him but getting stopped they wouldn't let me be with him.

reaching out to him as if i were trying to take his hand i mouthed back, "love you more" moving his hand weakly as he shook slightly trying to reach out back. the person holding me back moved and hizashi was getting rolled into the ambulance.

my hand that was reaching out to him slowly fell as the ambulance left. making my hand to my sides balling them up in fists as the echoing sirens faded into the distance. falling to my knees and crying into my hands i tried to hide my face from the world.

my thoughts were all rushing back into my head as i cried out to the cruel world. screaming out your name and curses to myself for not noticing earlier. i blamed myself i blamed rebekah i blamed the world. i was looking for anything to hold accountable for his death.

the town left me to cry, the house surrounded evenly on every angel. i was in the center of it all. crying in front of everyone. i was on a stage after all, running on an invisible treadmill trying desperately to reach out to hizashi. my dying love i couldn't be with in his possible final moments.

my cry turning to a wicked and hateful growl i stand up. forcing my body up as i whipped my hair back from my face showing my enraged eyes and grimaced growl. shouting to my audience who hid in houses and behind locked doors i blamed them. i blamed anyone who dare show me their face. i was about to go on a rampage before rebekah grabbed my sleeve.

whipping around to see her my eyes glowing a deep green hissing toxic and bringing my growl to a deep snarl i hiss, "you it was you!"  pushing her back as i tried to keep my composure i snarled and hissed my doubts and anger to her.

taking the cruel words and backing up she moved her head away trying not to get hit. holding up his phone with bloodied fingerprints that had been hastily wiped off. staying quiet he gave me the phone then ran inside not waiting for my response.

looking down at it confused and my ragging fit calmed i held the thing i could properly blame.

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im crying ;-;