evergreen | destiel

I

the first time.

the very first time that castiel met the soul, they were in a yellowed field outside of a small schoolhouse.

the year was 1904.

the wind was strong that day and the sky was covered with a thick blanket of clouds. castiel used the vessel of a small schoolboy, mostly because they were the easiest to get to say yes.

he honestly just didn't have anything better to do. why not hang around like this for a while? heaven was quiet for the time being.

the soul approached him in the form
of another young boy during recess time. grade 6,  just like the vessel castiel was in.

the angel was busy picking a piece of dead grass out of the ground and peeling it apart. he felt the soul's presence long before he saw them. they were warm, inviting, green. and they felt like home.

castiel looked up to see a boy towering over his crouched form. he had dirty blonde hair and welcoming eyes that were a color somewhere between moss and pine, with just little flecks of sage. very evergreen. freckles were sprinkled across his nose and under his eyes, but there weren't too many. just enough to count.

"what are you gawkin' at, ya crackpot?" the boy said.

"you approached me first." castiel replied defensively. he stood up to find out that he was a good few inches taller than this kid; at least in his current form. despite this, the blonde kid didn't seem to want to back down.

"you lookin' for a fight?" he asked, trying to be menacing. castiel tilted his head and narrowed his eyes, attempting to decipher this boy's feelings.

"not at all." he finally replied. he crouched back down to pick at another blade of grass. after a few minutes, the boy was crouching as well just a mere foot or so in front of the angel.

"what's your name?" the boy asked.

"castiel." came the reply.

"what kinda bunk is that?" the human asked. castiel was starting to come to the conclusion that this kid was a little rude. he stopped peeling his grass and met the boy's eyes. "i just mean i ain't ever heard a name like that before." he corrected. 

"well, what's yours?" castiel was squinting now, the sun was beginning to come out.

"dean." he said and smiled proudly. the wind whipped his blonde hair to part at the other side and castiel noticed it was darker underneath.

"it's nice to meet you, dean." castiel said and stuck out his hand for dean to shake. he knew it was a way humans greeted each other and he had worked hard at not seeming out of place.

"you too, cas." dean replied, shortening the angel's strange name.

in the few months of school that followed, castiel tailed dean everywhere like a lost puppy. father had allowed it, saying it was good that castiel get well acquainted with his most beloved creation. they became best friends, and while out loud dean would tease about castiel being a burden, inwardly he craved the attention.

they'd make mud pies, share lunch, and talk about nonsense all the way through each day. castiel would bask in this soul's light, their warmth. he dared say it was better than heaven. it was bliss.

one day, something peculiar happened.

"cas?" dean asked. they were sitting by the river, their pant legs rolled up and their feet being washed over by the cool water.

"yes?" the angel asked in reply, concentrating on the way the liquid ran between his toes.

"my parents... they were talking about a man 'round here they had heard about; a fairy. i didn't know what that meant, so i asked. they said it was a man that loves on other men." castiel was looking at dean now, curiosity laced in his gaze. "i ain't never heard of that before." dean was purposefully avoiding eye contact, focused on his hands in his lap.

"yeah, me neither." castiel lied. he was becoming good at that around dean. dean didn't need to know who he truly was. what he truly was.

"they said homosexuals are real simps." dean started. "they said they were coarse, no better than stray mutts that rut together."

"do you believe them?" castiel asked before he could stop himself. dean was meeting his eyes now, and castiel could sense the wavelengths of uncertainty coming off his aura. it was a long time before he replied.

"i don't know." he whispered. and it was silent.

"may i try something?" castiel asked. dean didn't say anything, only nodding. castiel moved to pick up dean's hand. it was covered in dirt from the riverbank and his fingernails were too long, but it was still perfect. dean's breathing stopped for a moment, and the only sounds were that of the rushing water. castiel slowly laced his fingers with dean's and set their combined hands back on the ground.

"how's that?" castiel asked. he liked touching dean. he could feel the soul burning beneath the boy's skin. and it was good.

"fine." dean gulped. castiel could still sense he was scared, so he acted on instinct and starting rubbing his thumb comfortingly over the back of dean's hand. eventually, they both turned their attention back towards the river. dean felt as if they were doing something forbidden, but he went with it. no one else was around, and he also felt invincible with cas's hand laced with his.

they sat like that, not saying a word, until the sun started to set and dean had to get back home. castiel walked him home like he always did, but this time whenever their hands would accidentally brush together when they walked, dean would blush fiercely.

once dean was home, castiel was bombarded with a voice in his skull.

"castiel." it boomed.

"yes, father?"

"it is time to come home."

"yes, father." castiel would be sad leaving dean.

"he will be fine without you." castiel's father replied. "you will see him again." the angel didn't question this and merely looked around to take one last look around earth before he left for who knows how long. in dean's small house the lights were still on. he would miss the boy. he reluctantly teleported back to heaven, god's words replaying in his head.

"you will see him again."

he trusted god. god knew everything, after all.