I swear I'd blast @RandomBabyMonkey to dust if I ever see that mortal in my sight. Talk about extreme level humiliating dare- no DISASTER. And I suppose I'll have to spill those here now.
Okay, then.
An Olympian meeting was the last thing I wanted after I was given that dare. I mean, seriously! Who calls for a meeting for such a lame reason as 'Zephyrus is missing'? Okay I take that back. That was probably a reason reason. Hmmm....was it?
Whatever.
With a bad case of migraine and with a very very heavy heart I went to the meeting disguised as Apollo. No, literally impersonating Apollo. With shaggy golden hair, a golden bow and a quiver filled with golden arrows slung over my shoulder; holding a golden harp and wearing a T-shirt which read: "I'm the best" (That was the best Apolloish statement I could come up with) and a tattered pair of blue jeans. George and Martha were disguised as a smartphone (George said he'd never talk to me again. Poor Martha just sighed). I readjusted the secret camera attached to the neck of my T-shirt (yes, I was supposed to record the whole drama) and voilà! Apollo went to join the meeting. All the minor gods and goddesses, the Muses and the nymphs of the eternal city were staring at me funny. Probably because I was Apollo (duh) and everyone knew about the whole trials of Apollo fiasco. I walked through the city trying to keep a low profile. Okay, I was Apollo. Fine. The disguise....only a mastermind like me could come up with such a flawless disguise. But my aura.... I thought. I couldn't change it even if I wanted to. I was just so.....well.....Hermes. If only I'd had my helmet, I could hide under it. I felt so identity-less as I walked towards the palace.
Soon enough I found myself standing in front of the big gates of the throne room. Very carefully I pushed aside the doors and sashayed into the Olympian council. Everyone was busy in a hot argument. Then all of them looked at me at the same time.
Silence
More silence
Only silence
Everyone was staring at me. And by everyone, I mean everyone.
Zeus, Poseidon, Hera, _-TheCerealGoddess-_ , _-QuietHestia-_ , _-WisestAthena-_ , _-LadyArtemis-_ , Ares, Dionysus, _-Hephastus-_ , _-YourLoveGoddess-_ and even _-TheSingleHades-_ and _-GoddessOfSpring-_ were there.
I had to act quickly before they registered from their shock and realized from my aura that the real Apollo was down there in Camp Half Blood. And the default Apollo a.k.a Hermes was standing in front of them. I turned on the video camera and knelt down to the floor.
Gods.
No.
I.
Could.
Not.
Possibly........
I licked it.
Once.
I licked it
Twice.
I regarded the still dazed Olympians and yelled, 'Yo! It's me, APOLLO!!! Miss me?
Save your applause for I'm now.....floor licking! Wanna join me fellas? It's fun.'
I licked the floor some more (HOW COULD I ???!!!!!) while Aphrodite's mirror fell out of her loose hand and broke into a gazillion pieces, Dionysus's goblet of wine fell out of his hand and spilled wine everywhere, Artemis passed out, Hephaestus dropped his hammer in Ares's lap, Poseidon accidentally hit Hera in her gut with his trident, Athena's eyes literally popped out of their sockets, Hades hugged a horrified Persephone and muttered something that suspiciously sounded like,'Momma I'm scared', Demeter threw up, Hestia dropped her cup of tea on Zeus's thighs and Zeus chewed on Athena's aegis.
I stopped you- know- what and got up. Artemis was the first one to speak, (or the first one trying to form words, anyway) 'Apo- Les- brother- wha-?!'
Then I ran. All the way down from mount Olympus into my comfortable van. I quickly kept the recording in a safe- from- viewers place and changed into my Hermes outfit, which is to say, myself and went back to mount Olympus in a oh sorry I'm late for the meeting had stuff to do did I miss something way. The Olympians were just starting to recover from their shock. Aphrodite came up to me and was like,'Oh dearie! Hermes. You don't want to know what just-
Artemis glared at her and she stopped herself. Then suddenly everyone started chattering so loudly that I couldn't hear anything. Only Zeus eyed me suspiciously and asked, 'Where were you?'
'I was uh...working! Delivering, you know.'
He didn't seem much convinced but he nodded grimly.
'Yes, I know. But my other son Apollo....how did he manage to-'
He went off, grumbling to himself. I stared at poor Artemis only to discover that she was crying. Everyone was gossiping about how Apollo (who was not- so- Apolloish) cleaned the throne room with his very tongue. And I felt very.....very guilty. Apollo didn't deserve this after going through so much. Then I decided that I'll tell them about the dare soon enough. Because it's only fair......isn't it?
Hmmm.......
Is it?
Whatever.
_-TheHottestGod-_ I'm sorry buddy. But surely you understand why I had to do this.
Gods! Dares are dangerous. More dangerous than Aphrodite's love spells.
Hmmm........
Are they?
