letters to you

Felicite Grace Tomlinson

Dear Fizzy ,

The thought that you or your family would probably never read this gives me a strange solace of this being between you and me. Your soul, and mine.

I remember when I was younger, I had been in the Directioner Fandom since 2010, I still am. I'd look up people in the One Direction family of my age and dream about becoming friends with them.

You, Felicite Grace Tomlinson, you were my age. Less than a month younger than me, I'd dream about becoming friends with you, after impressing the boys so much that I'd be closer with their families too.

I'd dream of becoming friends with you, talking and laughing about any and everything thing. Dream that we'd always find something to talk about, be it school, boys or even fangirling over our favorite member of One Direction.

You were beautiful, bright as the day and I loved looking at your pictures. I'd dream about laying on a couch in a hotel room and watching movies with you then squealing and fangirling over Ryan Gosling or the hot actor.

Throwing pop corn at the TV when the players would play wrong in a soccer match then laugh and cry when our favorite team would lose, laugh with all the jokes we'd cracked until the end.

I'd dream of traveling places with you and cuddling on the couch because we'd grown so close, under a throw blanket. And you'd take me to meet your siblings some time. Daisy and Phoebe and Doris and Earnie, your little munchkins, your babas.

I wish you could've been here so I could've bumped into you on the street and become friends with you. I wish you could've been here so we could've shared some inside jokes too. I wish you could've been here to at least be with your family.

Louis, Lottie, Daisy, Phoebe, Doris and Ernie miss you baba, you left us all too soon ❤️

I loved you Fizzy, living with your eyes in moments I couldn't and I'm torn, hurt, shattered, distraught and broken over why you left us so early.

But I love you baba, and I miss you. I hope you rest well in paradise ❤️

To you, my real-yet-imaginary best friend, the girl with the most strength and courage to grow up and be herself,

I love you, I always will.

I loved you first,

Rest easy Fizzy,
Yours in hoping to see you at least once in person even in heaven,
Biz x