Trombone Crush

5

Over the next few weeks, Jesse and I begin to spend more time together during band practice and text each other almost daily. Our friendship feels so natural and comfortable that it's almost surreal. 

My feelings for Jesse grow the more I get to spend time with him and get to know all of his silly quirks and flaws. Like a weed, those feelings are planted in my heart and keep growing even when I try to cut them down. And with the moving date looming overhead, casting a shadow on my happiness, I really know that I need to.

It's mid-October, things start picking up in the semester with classes and with the marching band as we learn some new music. The temperatures drop outside from unbearably hot, to nice and cool. Throughout today I keep to myself, like most days, and the time drags by until marching band practice.

I get to the band room and immediately see Jesse talking to a group of his friends. Jesse waves at me as I walk by and I smile shyly back as everyone else in his friend group looks to see who he's waving at. "Hey, Lana!" He makes a beckoning motion with his hand. Suddenly extremely self-conscious I join the group slowly. "We were just talking about a Halloween party we're gonna have this Sunday, do you wanna come?"

"Yeah, uh sure." I blurt out, desperate to have all the people stop staring at me, and thankfully, they do. After a minute practice starts and we get some new music. Jesse and I work together to figure out some of the more difficult notes.

"I'm pretty sure that this one is in the 5th position since its flat," I say.

"Oh yeah true, okay." Jesse takes his pen out from behind his ear and writes it in.

"Wow, do you always keep that there?" I tease, with a laugh.

Jesse raises his eyebrows at me in mock surprise "Uh yeah, I can't believe you didn't notice." He twirls the pen around on his fingers, then sticks it back behind his ear.

"Riiight, right. My bad." I purse my lips close to resist smiling as the band director steps onto the podium. Immediately a hush falls over the band room as he tells us about the next few games coming up. While he speaks, my mind wanders. My parents haven't brought up anything about the move for a while, and I've been too scared to bring it up. Would it be too hopeful to think that maybe they changed their minds or forgot? Probably. What will I tell Jesse when I have to go? Should I stop being his friend?

A gentle tap on the shoulder snaps me out of my thoughts and I realize that everyone else has their instruments up and are ready to play. I quickly pick up my trombone and smile gratefully at Jesse for bringing me back to earth.

Band practice ends a bit early for the day. I pack up my stuff and head out and Jesse follows me. I look back at him in surprise, normally he'll rejoin his gaggle of friends instead of walking with me after band. "Oh wow, to what do I owe this honor?" I tease.

He grins widely and even does a little bow. "I was gonna ask you if you wanted to hang out this weekend."

I raised my eyebrows in surprise, "Really?" I lean in a bit and then dramatically whisper, "Outside of school?"

"Ah what can I say." He shrugs playfully "I thought it was about time we became real friends."

I gasp, "We aren't already real friends?"

"Of course, everyone knows that you only become real friends once you hang out outside of school."

I laugh, "Wow, okay then yeah for sure! Does this Saturday work?"

"Yeah sounds good to me."

My dad picks me up and takes me home today and the ride back is pleasant. I play some calming music and stare out the window. Now that it's October the leaves on the trees are starting to change their color. Splashes of orange and red and yellow color my vision and give me the urge to rake up a leaf pile and dive right in it. I'm considering doing this once I get home when I notice a red sign in the front yard. My blood turns to ice in my veins when I read it aloud, "For sale?"

My dad looked over me, then grins excitedly "Yep! It's official. We'll be leaving right before the new year so you can get a new start for your second semester."

"Oh." I grip my seatbelt tightly and nod a little.

"Yep! Your mother and I are both thinking about writing books based heavily in the desert, so this change of pace will help us a lot." His eyes practically sparkle with his excitement as he unbuckles his seatbelt and gets out of the car.

I mechanically get out of the car as he goes on about how he can't want to be inspired by this new environment and all that.

"Aren't you just so excited for the adventure of moving to a new state and getting to explore it?"

"What about my friends? I finally ma-"

He waves me off "Just consider that practice! When we get to Arizona you can just do what you did here, again! Making friends isn't that difficult."

I wince at the unintended insult there, it's difficult for me. "Yeah, right um," I respond, "Um I have a lot of homework so." I head up the stairs to my room slowly. I sit on my bed for a little while. At the end of the semester. Of course.