Smoke kissed

13

I woke up due to a screeching sound of a woman. First I thought I was dreaming but then I slowly opened my eyes and the last night flooded my mind like a tsunami. I sat still... trying to grasp all the ideas. No. This can't be happening. And the dream went off again. Erika. "How dare you Blaze. Don't forget what you promised. " I didn't hear the reply but I shot up from the bed and quickly got dressed. I felt a soreness being evident in between my thighs and then I realized. I lost my virginity to Blaze. I looked at the bed, on the. Spot where our bodies had cuddled last night and saw droplets of blood adorning the beige sheets proudly. My eyes lingered on it for few moments but I soon recovered and when the argument downstairs was becoming louder and louder I slowly tip toed towards the door. I opened it a little and tried to eavesdrop, and then realized I should not have done that. Erica was frantically moving around the room as Blake tried to explain with lots of hand movements. He held her by her shoulder. "Do you think I liked ot Erica?  It was a fucking example of what can happen in the heat of the moment, I fucking hate myself for.... I wouldn't even say making love because I don't love her. I regret it as much as you do. It's perhaps the worst mistake I ever did in my life. Do you really think that anybody would voluntarily fuck that ugly bitch? "
I felt a kick of blankness hitting my stomach and chest. I closed my eyes and quickly wiped the lone trail of tear that betrayed me. I closed the door, I don't want to hear no more. I quickly rushed to the bathroom. I held the sink with my dear life and finally led out that suppressed sob. I looked up to the mirror, at my reflection... A pale, morose and ordinary girl with puffy eyes looked back at me and almost felt her smirk at me. I felt as if my own reflection sneered at me with disgust. I splashed some water on my face. I quietly went out of the bathroom and sat on the floor near the bed. I don't want to touch that bed ever. I sat crossed legged and looked up at the ceiling for God knows how long.

I heard footsteps and I quickly shot up on my feet. The door swung open and the only thing I saw was the his feet I can't look at him. I can't. I don't want you to ever see me cry Blaze, ever. He didn't move and neither did say anything and I didn't look up. I finally got the courage and slowly walked past him.... He didn't try to stop me from leaving. I walked towards the room that has been given to me and straight away and took a cold shower but even Unger the pressure of the chilled water on  my fave, I felt my warm eyes and the tears that slid off.

I felt weak. I felt sick..... I felt alone. The hole in my chest, the vaccumness never left and all I kept on questioning my self was "Am I that bad? " My subconscious didn't reply but I knew the answer. I skipped breakfast and spent the whole day working on my projects that was supposed to be delivered to Mr Atkinson and somewhere in this loneliness I kind of ended up expecting Blaze to come and check on me.

The whole morning went by and I lost my self in the world of painting. Seriously it's the only thing that gives me solace from the sadness. There was a soft knock on the door. "Ma'am? " That was the voice of the housekeeper. "It's open. Please come in. " She soon pushed the door open and revealed herself. She carried a covered tray of food. "Ma'am you haven't had anything since last night please have some food. " She is perhaps the next mother figure in my life. My stomach grumbled as I eyed the food. "Oh.. Okay... What am I having? " Sh3 smiled and put the tray in front of me. "I made some tomato Basil spaghetti with mozzarella along with some garlic bread. " It really smelled delicious and to be honest no matter how hurt you are, one cannot deny the human needs. Then suddenly as she was leaving, an idea struck me. "Umm.... Do you happen to know where... Uh... Blaze is? " She turned and the little smile she had on her face disappeared. She wasn't no strange to the problems. She knew exactly what was happening and that's natural when you live under the same roof. She looked disappointed. "Uh.. Sir went out... With a small luggage... He went to the other penthouse. He said he will be there for some time. " She smiled weakly at me and went out closing the door behind her.

Blake left.