Pillow | vmon

-fifteen-

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Taehyung beams as he posts a sneak peek of himself recording, the new tweet instantly gaining a positive reaction from ARMYs who were getting excited he was doing okay and working on something secret.

He laughs breathlessly at the funny memes underneath the tweet and the little messages of encouragement or anticipations, his smile eventually faltering when he notices a couple of replies asking if the video going around was really Namjoon or not.

Sighing, Taehyung sets the phone back onto the nearby desk and stretches.

"Are you sure you want to keep going?"

Taehyung looks up at the voice of the male staff member, whose brows were drawn together in slight concern. "You've been going over the lines again and again for quite a while, you sure you don't want a longer break Taehyung-ssi?"

"I just want to make sure everything is perfect." Taehyung sighs, already reaching to wear the headphones again. "But don't worry, I'll let you know when I'm tired."

"Alright. Just a few more lines and you'll be done for the day, huh? We'll call in Jin-ssi tomorrow."

"Sounds good! Thank you!"

And so Taehyung had continued to record, sheepishly asking the staff member to allow him to try again and again until he finally deemed it decent enough to be finished.

Even after everything had been packed up in the recording room, he'd stayed and sat by himself, quietly humming and marking different areas of lyrics he wanted to continue focusing on for future performances and discussions with the other members.

However, what started off as him being productive eventually turned into distracting thoughts, and a certain tall male crosses his mind again.

Taehyung huffs, leaning against the couch in the room in resign while the papers balancing on his lap falls to the side.

He'd been so occupied with his work to even dwell on the issue but now that he was temporarily free again, the current frustrations he had with the leader begin to return.

Taehyung runs a hand through his hair before setting it upon his lap, staring at his fingers like they were the most interesting thing in the world.

He never really cared to think about it but... why was he always trying so hard?

Since the beginning of time, it was always Taehyung who initiated everything. From what he could remember, whether it be in shows or doing something as simple as talking, he always had to be the one to approach Namjoon.

And at first, he didn't mind it at all, of course.

He knew Namjoon and Yoongi were not ones to display their affections for anyone openly except, the difference now was that Taehyung wanted his affections to be returned.

Taehyung... He was afraid, really, because he couldn't deny his feelings anymore.

He liked the leader. He truly did.

But what was even worse than simply having feelings toward his leader of all people, was the fact that his 'crushing' was one-sided.

And yes, there were moments here and there that would make Taehyung's heart flutter because the tall male would actually do something out of the ordinary to interact with him, but it was never enough. Even if Namjoon acted playful for a moment, the next second, he was distant and impassive all over again.

Even now, with the entire viral video incident, the leader hadn't even asked Taehyung for any opinions or if he wanted to come. He'd taken matters into his own hands and that really angered Taehyung, because it was his problem too.

Taehyung heaves a long sigh, gradually straightening from his slouched position when something suddenly dawns on him.

Why should he continue trying?

For the past month almost, Taehyung had done whatever he could to make the leader happy and feel reassured at every opportunity - but most of the time it was like talking to a brick wall.

Maybe it was because he was too childish or immature at times, but Taehyung knew that he was good at giving advice just like any other member. He should be taken as seriously as them too.

Taehyung didn't like the conclusion at all, but he didn't like the fact that he would probably never be someone precious to Namjoon even more.

So that is why Taehyung ultimately comes to a conclusion:

I'm going to avoid him.

It was childish, yes. But to be honest? It wouldn't be difficult.

If anything, there wouldn't be much of a noticeable difference at all.

So, after properly packing up, Taehyung goes home that night.

He eats some leftover chicken from the fridge.

He washes up.

He carefully changes into his pajamas.

And he enters his bedroom.

Taehyung purses his lips when his gaze flits around the room until it lands on Namjoon's bed which was still made and empty. For a second he'd really thought the leader would begin to improve but it was apparent that he was mistaken.

Instead of crawling into his bed, he grabs his blanket and pillow before stepping out into the hallway. After a short moment of contemplation, he begins making his way over to Jungkook's room, the only member that didn't have a roommate.

Taehyung is cautious and careful as he slowly enters the room and tiptoes toward the sleeping figure, holding his breath as he climbs onto the maknae's bed. Carefully easing himself onto the mattress, he places his pillow beneath his head and pulls his blanket over his body before turning to his side.

The silver-haired male tentatively throws an arm around Jungkook's tiny waist and hugs him close with an exhale of relief, his nose nuzzling into the soft and freshly washed fabric.

Jungkook sleepily whines at the new contact before peeping an eye open. "Hm? H-Hyung?"

"I'm sleeping here for today." Taehyung whispers and Jungkook squints his eyes in the dark before exhaling deeply through his nose.

"Mhm."

And so, Taehyung teeters on the edge of slumber, not fully slipping under unconsciousness for almost half an hour out of habit.

It isn't until he finally hears the front door open, indicating a certain tall male had made it home safely, that he is finally able to relax and completely fall asleep.

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