feelings fade

0.2

i couldn't even cry. but i was filled with such

sadness.

so i stared at the wall, wondering what was

going to happen.

i want the pain to go away. i want to feel happy

again.

i watched him, smiling the whole time, filled

with joy. but as soon as i turned him off, i was

back to reality.

my cheeks still hurt from smiling so hard for so

long. and they were real smiles.

i wish i could be happy again. the only thing

that brings me happiness is them.

i don't want this anymore. i want it to change.

please, lord if you're up there, stop the hurting.

or maybe i could just stop the hurting myself.

depression doesn't need a reason. it doesn't

need an age, or skin tone, or gender. all it

needs is someone to take down.

someone it can latch on to and make weak.

someone that it can push to their breaking

point.

and depression wants you to give in. they want

you to break.

so if i do, maybe i'll be doing something right

for once.