Precious Things || Jensoo

Chapter 42

Chapter Forty-Two

The summer unfolds in a way that my wildest dreams could not have hoped for.

My grandfather's penchant for keeping to a schedule means that he has to find a way to work Jennie into our lives. Simply through her refusal to go away, he's had to incorporate her.

Every Tuesday we got for a walk. At least, that's what my grandfather thinks we're doing. The little copse by the woods is our sanctuary, and has seen many a kiss from us.

Then there's Friday nights. Every Friday night at five pm, I stand at the door with my overnight bag packed. My grandfather walks me to Jennie's house, refuses tea from Hyorin, and then leaves me there.

Every Saturday morning at ten he retrieves me again.

Every single Friday night I spend with Jennie.

I swear to God I never thought this would be possible.

Every Friday, I appreciate just a little bit more that Jennie has super-powers that should, and probably are, illegal in 49 of the 50 states. Let's face it: California is damn permissive.

The rest of the week I split between day-dreaming and putting my head down and working. My grandfather has me grinding away, every day, on college admissions. My SAT scores were pretty good, in my opinion. My grandfather thinks that I can improve on a 2290. I personally don't think that's possible but he always was a perfectionist. I haven't quite gotten around to telling him that I really don't plan on taking the tests again, whatever he thinks.

Of course, a lot of the time that I'm 'working', I'm really day-dreaming about her. Sometimes, that makes me acutely uncomfortable. A lot of the time, actually.

Over the two months of the summer I've stunned myself with how far we've gone.

Jennie's not very good at keeping her hands to herself. I'm rather happy about that. I still haven't let her go all the way, but lately there's been less and less of a reason not to. I'm a lot more comfortable with her, and with the whole idea of sex with her.

We've certainly been edging closer.

She even gloats over the fact that she gets me down to my underwear nearly every single time now. Of course, she's only gloated once because I put all my clothes back on and didn't give in to her pouting. I won't have her using me like some kind of mountain to climb. I informed her of such.

She did a mighty fine job of making it up to me.

The second I started thinking about sex seriously, considering it as a real possibility, all my old anxieties came back.

I've never done it before, and I'm petrified that I'll mess it up royally.

I'm scared that Jennie will be upset.

She's pretty volatile. She's sweet to me; she treats me so well. She takes care of me and fusses over me. She's made it her own personal crusade to give me all the things that she thinks my grandfather has kept from me.

She treats Kyla like crap, even after our little talk.

Oh, she's well and forgiven her for kissing Jongin, mostly because I talked that one around. But she just can't seem to accept that Kyla wants to be her friend. I think I've improved their relationship a little, and I'm nice to Kyla, but it's not enough. I still see the sadness in the young girl's eyes.

I think it's jealousy, actually, on Jennie's part. Kyla came to them when she was ten, and Jennie was eleven. She was young and scared, and her mother had just died of breast cancer.

From Jennie's point of view, though, here was a kid who'd had everything.

This summer saw the anniversary of Kyla's mother's death, though. It was the first and only time I've seen Jennie be genuinely sweet and caring to her sister. It's an annual routine, but she does take care of Kyla when the kid is down.

Other than that, it's bratty sisters all the way.

Jennie can be a mega-brat.

And even though she's always treated me with the utmost respect and care, I worry that she might lose interest if I'm lousy in bed.

I mean, I've done okay thus far.

Mostly a game of copy-cat, if I'm going to be honest with myself.

The first time she got my top off completely, I was too wrapped up in her to notice. We were making out, our lips hot against each other. She slid down my body and took my nipple into her mouth before I even noticed I was naked from the waist up.

I've never felt anything so incredible in my whole life.

Until I did it to her.

She tastes so fucking good. And when she was hot in the cavern of my mouth, with my tongue flicking over her hardened nipple, I swear she nearly broke my skin. She actually swore my name and bucked.

It was amazing.

I can't stop thinking about it.

I can't stop thinking about her.

I think she might have turned good little buttoned-down Jisoo into a bit of a sex maniac. One who hasn't had sex yet.

I want it to happen naturally. I want it to flow on and be special. I don't need it to be perfect. I just need to know she's happy with the outcome. I don't even care about me. The problem is that I know it's my decision.

I'm the one who has to tell Jennie she doesn't have to stop.

I know she's had sex before.

I know she's had sex with a girl before because I flat out asked her one day. She dated someone called Maggie for nine months before Jongin and they did have sex a few times. I know she's had lots of sex with Jongin although I try not to think about that. Despite my complete ignorance, I'm also fairly certain that sex with a girl and sex with a boy is not the same thing.

I want to go there with her so badly.

Not because I'm 'supposed to'. Not just because she wants it, although I know she does. Every time we stop her eyes have this glazed-over look and I can feel her tension. Once or twice we've been down to our underwear and she's brushed across me and I've had to gasp at how wet her underwear is. That always makes me a bit more wet, too.

No, I want to go there because I want to be there with her. I want to make love to her. I want her to know I love her.

Because I might have thought I loved her before she even knew me, but I now know that was a lie. Because being with her has made me love her so much more completely.

So much more than I thought was possible.

I want to give everything I have to her. I want to be everywhere with her.

I don't know if she feels the same way. She hasn't said as much. I think she does. I'm getting pretty good at reading her. But I'm not sure.

I just know that tomorrow is going to be interesting.

If I get up the guts to tell her she doesn't have to stop.

If I can do that.

I might just find heaven with my Jennie.

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