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I walked downstairs with a baby who is in a fluffy dressing gown which is tied closed around her waist, as she was being held at my waist with her head resting on my shoulder
"How was your first night?" Hoseok asked looking up at us "it wasn't any different, waking up to a crying frightened baby!" I said "I heard the scream, I was wondering if I should go check but it stopped quite quickly!" Jimin said and I smiled
"Yeah, I'm used to it I know how to stop it quickly, but don't be afraid to come and check up on her seriously, she loves you guys!" I said smiling
"It's the first I've seen her not hyper!" Taehyung said "really is that so?" Hoseok said and her head shot up, she can't have heard him the first time
"HOBI!" She shouted got out of my grip and toddled over to him as he picked her up, now making me realise a few of them are shirtless...
Jimin Hoseok Namjoon
"So your dressed?" Namjoon asked and I nodded "I always cover up when I get up!" I smiled and Jin looked at me
"Cover up but you still show?" Jimin asked and I shrugged "that doesn't matter, I feel more comfortable, like this!" I said and he nodded
"I see that devil is probably still asleep!" Jin said "Shut up I'm here!" I heard and turned swing a shirtless jungkook rubbing his eyes...Woah his tattoos look amazing
"Like it?" Jungkook smirked and I blushed "nope just looking at the tattoos!" I said
"What do you mean no, I wish I had his body, I'm fat and ugly!" Jimin said "No your not!" I gave him a mean look "oh I am!" He said "Jimin stop calling yourself fat and ugly when your clearly not!" I said and he rolled his eyes
"Well sorry that your perfect!" He said "JIMIN!" Jin snapped "your going to cause something!" Jin said "She's arguing with what I believe, well she doesn't have to worry, she's clearly good enough, she doesn't even need a salad, she needs fat!" Jimin said
"Okay quit it Jimin would you!" Jin snapped again "it's okay, I guess we're both the same in believing different, I What he's saying isn't true to me and what I'm saying isn't true to him!" I said
"What do you mean?" Hoseok asked sitting down as they all began to listen in and I looked at jin "you don't have to tell them!" Jin said "it's okay!" I said with a soft smile
"I'm ashamed of myself, ashamed of who I am and how I look!" I said and they were confused
"She means she doesn't like it about her!" Jin said "What are you serious your perfect!" Hoseok asked and I shook my head "Nobody is perfect, especially not me Hoseok, it's a reason I'm not that fond of being with someone...ever!" I said "Why?" Jimin asked
"If I really dislike my body I'm not going to let anyone see it, or touch it!" I said "I touched it!" Jungkook said and I nodded
"You were giving me something to make me feel better about myself, to cover up my shame, do you want to know why I actually picked it?" I asked jungkook and he just looked at me
"Because of my eomma and to myself, flowers are happiness and my eomma loves flowers, I love art and I love flowers, to know my eomma was going through what I was, to know we would suffer our self from dying, she always told me, a flower could make anyone smile no matter what's going on, flowers are ment to make you happy!" I said and he just looked at me
"It also represents, all the people I've watched suffer, the people who were tortured so much before they were killed, one of them being my Eommas sister, all these people torture by the hands of the man I hate, it represents them because they deserved to be happy they were innocent people with families!" I said
"That's also a reason my eomma choose her tattoo, because she's a kind heart women who wants everyone to be happy, she would give everyone in the world a flower to make them feel better, she taught me how to stand strong, it worked but deep inside it didn't, there are so many things that can hurt me, even if they don't touch me, so many things that could trigger my past, nothings happy in my life, my hearts broken the pieces not even by a guy, by everything around me, everything hurts me, everything makes me suffer!" I said tearing up
"That's why I chose that drawing!" I said "And I think it was the best reason and best choice!" Hoseok said
"Because Nadiya, we are in your life now, we are going to make sure your happy with us, and safe, you have no reason to be hurt around us, we will make you feel loved and confident, because we've all got scars, we've all had a bad past with our parents, be lucky you and Namjoon still have yours, some of us are glad we don't and some aren't, we all have a terrible past, yes even namjoon, we've felt the pain, and we fought through it, we don't want you to be ashamed of anything, because in everyone's eyes your beautiful, very, your amazing, good looking, your unique and your body it's amazing, like they said at the shop, your skin and shape is the best one we've ever seen and I'll tell you now, you do like your self, but your brain can't work that out, you do body routine, you were clothes to show off your body, you body likes itself you like It, it's just your brain thinking of the past, let it go, that's why it's called past, you walk past it and never go in front of it or face it because the future wants to make you feel good about yourself!" Hoseok said and I looked down as my tears fell on the floor
"You boys really rather trigger me or make me cry because of how you say things!" I said wiping my eyes "we need to know you!" Jimin said and I nodded "Alot of my past can't be said, because it's worse then what you saw last night jin!" I said "we just need to know What your triggers are!"Jin said
"Don't ask me if it hurts to eat a salad, don't use chains near me, don't whip your belts, don't make the baby cry, punishments, whether your being threatening or joking, and screams, oh and dark unknown rooms!" I said
"Holy fuck, I want to know now!" Namjoon said "I could tell you the punishment story, the baby's story and dark rooms that about it unless your okay with me not knowing what I do and act out of fear!" I said "that's okay!" Hoseok smiled
"I guess your impression on me was wrong!" I said to jungkook "I guess It was!" He said "there kids would be so cute!"Taehyung said
"Nope, that's not happening, not with him no with anyone!" I said and sat in the living room
