I, Dean Winchester, am in love with Castiel Novak ***UNDER EDITING***

Chapter 12

"Morning....'" Dean's voice said, quiet and week, as my eyes began to open.

"Hey" I yawned, looking into his almost lifeless eyes, "How you feeling?"

"Honestly..." He sighed, "Like crap" I hugged him.

I had to admit that i was scared to death that he was going to die, that something would happen, and without Dean here next to me, helping me, loving me, I don't know what i would do.

I brought my hand up to the side of his face, just looking into his sad, lifeless eyes. He was pale and had lost so much weight in the last day. He wasen't hungry for anything, not even pie...I didn't know what else I could do, what else could anyone do?

The doctors and nurses sucked at there job, it angered me. They didn't know what was wrong and it was as if they stopped trying. Stopped trying to save him and just gave up. I would never give up on Dean.

"Cas..." Dean breathed out a long breath, "I-I...Love you" He gave me a week smile and i just hugged him. Nothing could be said, nothing needed to be said.

we sat in silence for hours. A few day's passed and not much was said, we talked about Sam, and how happy Sam was with Gabe. That made Dean smile.

Sam came around to the hospital to visit one day, he couldn't even talk much. I told him it was okay, even though no one believed it. I barely believed anything I was saying lately. Sam cried, but he soon had to leave for a number of reasons. I never left, I didnt care about school or my grades or anything, i only cared that Dean was alive still, and i will be by his side till his last breath.

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It was late at night when it happened.

Dean had fallen asleep with me cuddling him closley. I didn't really sleep, I fell asleep for an hour but when i woke up, there was one long continuous beep.

maybe in another life

"Dean.." I cried into his chest, but i couldn't hear a thing, no breath, no heartbeat, nothing.

I could find you there

"You can't leave me like this" I almost screamed, tears pouring down my face like a waterfall.

Pulled away before your time

The pain in my chest was almost too much to bare. It felt as if my heart was breaking into a million peices.

I can't deal its so unfair

I didn't even notice when the nurses and doctors walked in. All i could hear was my own sobbing.

And it feels

I felt someone's hand on my back, "I'm sorry son, you have to leave" a man said but i couldn't just leave.

And it feels like

"NO" I cried, pulling myself away from the man's grip and hugging Dean's lifeless body closer. 

Heaven's so far away

Before I knew it, people were dragging me out of the room, away from Dean. "Let me through!" I screamed as they dragged me away, closing the door on my face.

And it feels

I fell to my knees in front of the door, unsure of what i was going to do, unsure of how I was going to live without him. He was the love of my life, and now he's dead.

Yeah it feels like

"Time of death, 2:34am" A voice said sadly from inside the room.

The world has grown cold

"This can't be real" I cried quietly to myself, "this isnt real!"

Now that you've gone away

The door opened again and the man let me see Dean for the last time. I ran to his lifeless body and jumped up onto the bed, feeling how cold he had become I hugged him close, begging him to wake up.

"Please wake up" I cried into the crook of his neck, "Please" but his lifeless body didn't move, his green eyes didn't look into mine again and tell me everything was going to bve okay, 'cause nothing was okay now. Nothing would ever be okay again...

"I'll be with you soon" I sobbed into his ear, even though i knew he was gone, "We can be togther again."

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I was almost in tears while writing this, im sorry...

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