The Path I Crave!

Chapter 14

Chandni

'Chandni! Chandni! Chandni!' I hear my colleague cum roommate Sam shouting my name across the floor. I try to conceal myself from him behind my cubical even though I'm aware he is just going to amble towards me.

Unnecessary yelling!

'Okay, I have two big news for you. The first, I heard you have been picked up for the new project 'Mystifying Europe' which is due in two weeks' he said whispering loudly.

'Wow' that is great news. Best in a year. Mystifying Europe is going to be a 45 minute program telecasting Europe in a unique way for both backpackers and extravagance travelers. The team gets to travel Europe over a period of nine months all through from London to London. A round trip! This has been exciting every employee in the TRAVEL Network for couple of months now.

I bear hugged Sam, jumping around the cubical. Sam and I have been friends, colleagues and roommates for a year now. When I came to London, I was offered to stay in an apartment alone but that lasted until I met Sam. We connected immediately and we have been friends ever since.

'That's great news' I say failing to conceal my excitement. I have been thinking about this project but since it's just been a year, I never thought I would make it. I enjoyed every bit of learning I earned from this job. It's exciting, challenging, creative, everything to keep me on my toes.

Preventing from drifting back home!

Past year has been more of learning the work from the backend of telecasting with a segment of travelling. I have earned experiences in every department of the network. I have been in ready to go mode for a year now. There were no work, I wouldn't want to do, challenging or boring, I was always in a ready mode.

Enlightening!

'We should celebrate. Dinner's on me' Sam says grabbing the chair. 'Okay, for the second news, I think you should sit down' he says offering me the chair.

He said two big news, right?

Why should I sit for the second news? He said big not good.

'The guys in your wallpaper, the guys you won't talk about, they are famous' he says shoving the magazine before I can respond and leaves me alone.

The instant my eyes meet the pungent eyes on the magazine two things happened. The first is my eyes tears up, secondly my hand instinctively moves on my stomach. In seconds my tears successfully blur the image before me. The loss I feel within is immense, I want to run, I want to hide, I want to blink my tears away and admire the faces I have missed tremendously.

I urge myself to stay strong, I want to see them but If I do, I will be left broken. I never want to appear as a weak link in the office. I have been strong for a year, irrespective of the loss and pain I had to suffer from not just missing my family but losing my unborn.

A month in London, I realized I wasn't alone. I was conceived with Adi's baby, our baby. I felt awful for leaving home. I was convinced I needed to go back home and inform Adi the news. I couldn't wait to share the news of becoming a mother. As much as I was thrilled with the idea, I missed Adi and Rishi. The first couple of months were filled with morning sickness. I needed my brother to take care of me and assure I would be fine. Instead I found myself alone in a country where I had no kith or kin.

The loneliness began consuming me, I engrossed myself with more and more and more work. The stress and solitude made to loss my unborn in the fifteenth week. I had no reason to go home and tell Adi how I lost his unborn baby. The thought of Adi's awareness regarding the loss, only terrified me.