Highway to Thirty

RoraimaA

Why is this so difficult? It shouldn't be this difficult to wish someone a happy birthday. Who came up with the idea anyway? I am so going to hit her when I see her.

I wish I could just write Thanks and be done with, but people will literally kill me if I do that (but I'm so tempted).

I'll try to just let it flow, so I'm sorry if it is too long or short. What you see is what you get, so please don't judge xd.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I notice it was my turn. I was so nervous. I had my speech written down, but I knew I could mess everything up anyway. It has happened before, so I wouldn't put it past me to not do it this time. My being really doesn't understand how people do this, especially in big weddings or press conferences. How can they get up and talk in front of the people and express their feelings, share their thoughts, tell their memories and say their wishes without passing out? A question for later, I guess.

My legs shook as I got up and walked to the little stage in front of the audience. I had my speech in one hand and in the other I was holding a glass of champagne (That is what you drink in these cases, right? xd). I reread again what I had written. I copied Miguel in Coco and did a high-pitched scream. Na, I'm lying, I didn't do that, but it would have been awesome.

I tried to break the ice by saying a Brexit joke (I really hope this thing doesn't offend anyone) I found on Google "Why does Britain like tea so much? Because tea leaves" I laughed, I'm super dumb and I always laugh at it.

The ice was broken so it was time to really start this thing, I sighed and started talking. "I'm super nervous, so... sorry about this.I guess I'm supposed to talk about how I met you, but I actually don't remember how I ended here. I know it was because of Eli, I saw Stephen as the cover and probably got curious. I don't remember the exact details, but I must have been impressed because I'm not really a person that follows people on Wattpad and I somehow followed you".

I looked down at my notes and suddenly, I couldn't understand what it said anymore. It must have been because I was more or less freaking out. I had to improvise and just say what I could remember from what was written in the notes. "Shortly after I started following you,there was a fight. I don't even know what people were fighting about, but you were mad. You posted a wall message (I don't know if they are called like that, but I hope you get the point xd) saying how you don't like the daddy kink and being a dad to us. The thing that really gained my attention was that you said something like"daddy here won't be happy if this happens again" and it sounded so sarcastic. I knew after that message that I would be your fan. Those words were my downfall (xd)" I paused.

I should talk about the books, I thought. "So, I became your fan. I have read almost all your books, and let me tell you, boy, they are amazing".

I considered letting it just like that, but when I opened my mouth again, it felt wrong to change the topic. I couldn't leave it at that, so I continued. "They get to you. You write in a way that makes you feel everything. Every emotion, every caress, every fight,every betrayal (I'm looking at you, Charlie). They are so complex,not just because of your writing style, but because of the double meaning, the cultural references, just everything. They would be a hell of a lot to translate, let me tell you (I might or might not have tried, jeje [I have even considered making one of your books my final project, if you agree, of course... although talking about the double meaning comments in front of my parents and teachers? Yeah,forget I said anything], but can I help you with Pirouette Spanish,please?)" I could die just talking about the books, but it would take too long (That's what he said...? xd)

I sighed again and took a sip from my champagne. I didn't even know if I could do that before the toast, but fuck it. "I have been here for two years and I have seen your books getting uploaded. I have seen you go from super online to taking small breaks and now this big one. But, to be completely honest, my favorite part of this fandom,because let's be honest, this is a fandom, is the wall and the people in it".

I read my notes and notice that I have skipped a few things. I knew I would mess up, but it's better this way because I have been taking too long anyway. "I was (And more or less are, actually xd) a silent reader, but one of the best decisions I ever made was to join in on the fun of your wall. The people there are just amazing. Seriously".

I was getting emotional and I knew I would start ranting. I tried to stop it, but well, I couldn't. "I don't know if you feel the same because I know they might act differently with you, as well as when you are here, but these people are truly amazing. I can't even explain how grateful I am for stumbling into your wall and meet such a community. Even if the error message mess with me and my incredibly rare responses/posts".

"And let me tell you, I found on that wall people that I would gladly take a bullet for (you know who you are xd). They are some of the most incredible people I have ever met. They are so weird, so chill, so funny, so caring, so open minded, just so amazing. Damn, Oli, I swear I don't have enough adjectives or words in general to express how amazing these people are. If I feel blessed for having them in my life, I can't even think of what you must feel" I was rambling and talking a lot, I knew that, everybody knew that, but I really couldn't stop (No, seriously, I can't stop). I wondered how weird it would be if I asked someone to gag me in that moment. "I could kiss you and kill whoever annoys you, just to show how grateful I am to you. You technically led me to them and, I don't know if I'm getting too ahead of myself (I probably am xd), but I really hope we(just to clarify, we as the girls and I(?, not you xd [I would be happy to meet you, though]) get to meet in person one day" I stopped there. I really was getting carried away and people must be bored by now.

I should have finished my speech there, but I still hadn't talked about him, so that's what I did next. "I don't know if I said it before or if you can see it, but I am actually intimidated by you(jeje, sorry about that), so I have never really talked to you, but I feel about you the same way I feel about my girls. You are mine now(I would add here the shrugging emoji, but sadly I can't. Smh, Wattpad, step up your game [I GOT SIDETRACKED])" I didn't know how he would feel after these words left my mouth, but I will run for the hills as soon as I could finally leave the stage anyway.

"I don't know a lot about you. I know even less that you normally share because I'm oblivious to things (YOU ARE LACTOSE INTOLERANT AND I FOUND OUT LIKE A MONTH AGO [You poor baby will never get to taste the maravillousness {the word doesn't exist. I know xd. I'm running out of the insert-your-opinion things} of the tequeños {It's Venezuelan}, but don't worry, baby, I will eat them for you]). Also, did you know that you're blond? BECAUSE I DIDN'T [I need to start paying attention to things xd] and I have a lot of questions for you, but don't worry, I won't ask them (because you know, I respect your privacy, not because I'm intimidated, not at all)"

I paused there and wondered if I should keep going or stop talking...People could scroll down or swipe, I guess (I know I would xd) "But what I do know about you is that you really care. You care about your writing and about being accurate. You care about your friends and about spending time with them even if you keep sober. You care about and love your family with your heart. You care about us, a bunch of strangers... The point is, your heart is made of gold and you deserve the world and I really hope you get it one day".

"Well,this is the end. Finally. So, happy birthday, Oli. Thank you so much for everything. You are one of those people I would feel more than honored to call my friend if I could. And, as you would say, cheers"I drank my champagne and went to my seat. I was halfway there when I remembered I forgot to say something important. I hurried back to the stage. "Sorry. I forgot something. Oli, baby, angel, can you please, please, pleaaaase come permanently back on May 4th or July 17th,please? It would be awesome if you do. (SERIOUSLY, CAN YOU COME BACK ONE OF THOSE DAYS, PLEASE?). Thank you".

RoraimaA

•••

23) a lot of people would say 'sexy' is about the body. But to me, 'sexy' is a woman with confidence. I admire women who have very little fear. allegra versace. a thing to remember.