A Boy Named Kookie

Sippy Cup Sadness

As the door clicks shut behind Jin, I feel a sense of dread wash over me. The hopeless thoughts begin to swirl around my mind, and Yoonie doesn't know how to handle the onslaught of emotions so fat drops spill down my cheeks. I shuffle back to the couch and wrap up in the quilt Tae had given me for my birthday, it was plush and covered in kittens just what I needed for comfort. My heart can't seem to understand why Jungkook has to be taken away. Jin has been the happiest I have seen him in almost two years. The midget really did bring warmth to us and even the apartment. Everything baby had been packed up, well except for my stash, all but for the playpen. It would have been too difficult to pack the large item up and so Jin decided it would be easier to just take care of it when he gets back. Now I find myself looking at it and wondering if I could sit in it.

I shake my head and look at the forgotten cup of milk on the coffee table. I am going to need something stronger in order to make it through the day. With paci in mouth and quilt around shoulder, I shuffle towards the kitchen. Jin always has alcohol hidden around for emergencies and I have deemed my emotional storm a state of emergency. I look in the cupboard by the fridge and come up empty, he must have moved it higher because of our recent houseguest. No problem, I have some hidden of my own. Making my way to the fake fern resting in a tangerine-colored vase on the tv hutch, I pull the leafy plastic imposter from its confines to reveal a mostly full bottle of malt whiskey.

I pluck the bottle out of the vase and carry it to the couch along with a sippy cup I stole from the ones bought for Jungkook. Setting both incriminating items before me I contemplate just how I got to this point. My small frame shrouded in mint colored material of a stolen sweater, legs bare except for my boxers, paci clipped to said sweater dangling uselessly, and alcohol sat before me, I have hit rock bottom this very morning. I can't help but laugh at the pitiful sight. Why does everything have to crumble at once? Jin is losing his source of happiness, I can't seem to crawl out of my pit of emotions, and Hoseok has seen my deepest kept secret: Yoonie. Deciding that enough is enough I reach for the alcohol and take its cap off and open the sippy cup just as nonchalant. Without adequately thinking through my actions I slosh the malt whiskey into the sunshine patterned cup and cap both containers as I look at the mess made.

With sippy cup in hand, I gather both myself and blanket to clamber over to the playpen. I take a long swig from the sippy cup and throw caution into the wind stepping over the fence and making myself comfortable within its confines. The padded bottom and random plush scattered about making the space a perfect place to drink away the pain and pass out comfortably. With the sun shining brightly through the bay window I once again bring the cup to my lips.