'Life With Lauren' magazine

Acne: you are just as beautiful with it, as you are without it

So, my relationship with my skin hasn't been the healthiest for the past five years, simply because I didn't feel beautiful in my own skin.

There was many times where I didn't want to even leave the house because of how embarrassed I was of my own face.

None of my friends ever had ONE breakout and I always felt like the "ugly" one. I tried so many different methods, creams, washes, toners, moisturizers, and many many more things to try and make it go away (or at least make it a little better, or less painful) but nothing worked.

People would assume that I just never washed my face, (I always washed it once at night and in the morning.) and would tell me to simply "drink water."   But the truth of the matter is that everyone is different, what works for your skin may not work for mine, but I would always get discouraged when something that made my skin worse, worked wonders for someone else.

For the past several months I have taken pictures of myself on my "good" skin days and my "bad" skin days.

The beginning of this journey was SO hard for me because I would NEVER take a picture of myself if it wasn't a "good" skin day. I wanted to pretend like I didn't have "bad" skin days so, I never wanted documentation.

Spoiler alert:
Every day is a "good" skin day.

Some days were better than others, some were a lot worse but either way, I trudged on. Sometimes, I took the picture and didn't look at it for a couple weeks but I STILL took it. I STILL kept it on my camera roll. I didn't let myself delete any of them.

I didn't know exactly what I was doing, but I was doing it,
and something was happening.

Day after day, week after week I kept taking them, and time after time it got easier and easier.

I became, empowered.
I fell in love with my skin.

I was accepting my skin, right where it was.
I was accepting myself.

I was meeting myself day after day where I was, with the same love and acceptance I showed everyone else. It was time for me to be kind to myself, too.

With every photo I took I was teaching myself that it was okay not to be 'picture perfect'.

I was teaching myself that I am still worthy with cracked and broken skin.

You are not worth any less the day you have cystic acne than the one you have perfect skin.

It's still you. Your skin is not all that you are made up of.

My skin has softened every tear, has cooled me off and kept me warm on the coldest nights. Has let me smile, laugh, kiss, wink. It has let me feel someone holding my hand, and felt the coziest hugs. How could I have hated something so much that let me experience so much love and light?

It's crazy how something as simple as taking a picture can change you. How beautiful and delicate is life sometimes huh?

The journey will be uncomfortable.

I don't know what journey you're on but I hope you can find the strength and courage that I know is in you to keep going. To keep taking the picture no matter how much it hurts sometimes. And grow.

Meet yourself where you are everyday with love and acceptance. Be gentle with yourself. You are worth the time it takes to heal yourself from anything you're going through and to learn how to love yourself completely.

Take the picture. And grow.