A Maid's Life

I wanna end me...

Eren's POV.

"Bite my tongue, bide my time
Wearing a warning sign
Wait 'til the world is mine
Visions I vandalize
Cold in my kingdom size
Fell for these ocean eyes

You should see me in a crown
I'm gonna run this nothing town
Watch me make 'em bow
One by one by, one
One by one by
You should see me in a crown
Your silence is my favorite sound
Watch me make 'em bow
One by one by, one
One by one by (one)"
(Song by Billie Eilish, You Should See me In a Crown)

I changed the song.

"My Lucifer is lonely

Standing there, killing time
Can't commit to anything but a crime
Peter's on vacation, an open invitation
Animals, evidence
Pearly gates look more like a picket fence
Once you get inside 'em
Got friends but can't invite them

Hills burn in California
My turn to ignore ya
Don't say I didn't warn ya

All the good girls go to hell
'Cause even God herself has enemies
And once the water starts to rise
And heaven's out of sight
She'll want the devil on her team
(Song by Billie Eilish, All the good girls go to hell)"

Not feeling this song. I changed it again.

Billie

"What do you want from me? Why don't you run from me?
What are you wondering? What do you know?
Why aren't you scared of me? Why do you care for me?
When we all fall asleep, where do we go?

Come here
Say it, spit it out, what is it exactly
You're payin'? Is the amount cleanin' you out, am I satisfactory?
Today, I'm thinkin' about the things that are deadly
The way I'm drinkin' you down
Like I wanna drown, like I wanna end me

Step on the glass, staple your tongue (ahh)
Bury a friend, try to wake up (ah ahh)
Cannibal class, killing the son (ahh)
Bury a friend, I wanna end me
(Song by Billie Eilish Bury a Friend)"

I bop my head to the rest of the song, cutting my thighs  away. I like the pain. I hear a knock on the door. I ignore it. The pain is getting to much to handle now. Better get up and wash the blood away. It's no use anymore. Why can't Levi just let me die already. The knock on the door was heard again.

"EREN! OPEN THIS DOOR NOW!"

I roll my eyes.

"You want me dead anyways. Why should I open the door for you?"

I hear Levi sigh.

"Eren, I will open this door if you don't let me in already. I'll get Kenny."

"EREN FUCKING JAEGER!"

I take the knife and I jab it inside my chest. I want to be free again mom. I yell from the pain and tears rolled down my face.

"For the debt I owe, gotta sell my soul
'Cause I can't say no, no, I can't say no
Then my limbs all froze and my eyes won't close
And I can't say no, I can't say no"

"I-I can't d-do this anymore Levi I can't! I'm sorry!"

I took out the knife and blood care rolling down my chest and I smile.

"I wanna end me..."

I sang with the song. And I stabbed my chest one more time and the door banged open
__________
I woke up with a quick jump. I looked at my clock. 1:00 am. I huffed and puffed. I was sleeping next to Levi. He caught up to me as soon as I went into my old room and grabbed a knife. He took the knife and threw it into the little pond outside. I'm tempted to get it back. I look down at my black silk short dress/gown thingy. Lace trimming of corse. Levi made me wear things to bed so I won't feel self conscious  around him at all. I get up and go to the bathroom attached to the room. I look into the mirror.

"I wanna end me..."

I hear the lyrics play in my head over and over. I will never try to commit suicide again I thought to myself. NEVER.