big man in town | sabriel

9 | crush

sam.

as i was texting gabe i realized he hadn't seen my new hair. i snapped a quick selfie and sent it to him, hoping he liked it.

after i hit send i sighed and laid back on my bed. then suddenly, dean barged into the room.

"sammy, we gotta talk." i sat up and raised my eyebrows in question. "about what i said." he clarified. i nodded my head slowly and looked down to the ground.

"i didn't think you'd remember that." i said truthfully.

"yeah, well, i do. are you mad at me?"

i was taken aback by this.

"why would i be mad at you?"

"because i didn't tell you as soon as i found out." he said like it was obvious. i shrugged.

"i just figured you had a good reason."

it was his turn to be taken aback. he took a step back and looked at the ground. "i did." he began. "i didn't want to think about it. i just wanted to forget for a while."

i nodded slowly. "that's okay." i said honestly. "you know i'm always here for you." i met his eyes and a mutual understanding flowed between us. i expected him to say 'no chick flick moments' or something of a similar snarky nature, but instead he did something that surprised both of us.

he pulled me in for a hug.

the last time we hugged was before i left for college. we'd never once in our lives hugged just to console one another. but now we were, and it was refreshing. i fought back tears.

"i got you." i said. dean had been strong for me my entire life. it was time for me to pay it back. he sniffled into my hair and patted my back a couple times. he pulled away and held me at arm's length. we shared a smile for a few moments before my phone went off and broke us out of our trance. he let go of me and i reached down to retrieve the device. before he left the room, i said one last thing.

"if you ever need to talk, you know where to find me. and you can stay here for as long as you like."

he smiled warmly. "thank you sammy." he said. he went into the other room and shut the door behind him, and i collapsed back on the bed.

it was going to be hard to keep my emotions hidden from dean. but he deserved not to worry about me for a little while. i cried for adam and i cried for ellen and now i'm done. no more.

right then, i needed to focus on logistics. i opened my bedroom door and stuck my head into the living room. i could hear my brother rummaging around in the kitchen.

"hey dean?" i called.

"yeah?"

"was there like... a funeral?" i asked hastily.

"no." came the reply. "you know how everyone acted towards him. he was just cremated and forgotten about. it was sad."

i sigh sadly as i remember. his parents neglected him and pretended he didn't exist like 99% of the time. that's why he was always at our house. sometimes stuff like that just catches up with you...

"we should have a little memorial." i decided. dean poked his head from around the wall to look at me.

"are you gonna invite mom and dad?" he asked. i shrugged.

"maybe."

he raised his eyebrows. "but then they'll know you dropped out right?"

secretly i was worried about the same thing, but i didn't want to outwardly show it. i waved him off. "semantics." i stated simply.

i retreated back into my bedroom and flopped onto my bed, looking at my phone. there were a few messages from gabe.

gabe: WOW 😍 BEAUTIFUL 💞💞
gabe: *cough* i meant...
gabe: it looks good 👍

i giggled and typed a reply.

me: thanks 💕
me: we should go on another date sometime soon. my treat?

gabe: of course we should, i'm irresistible. and no, my treat.

me: no, *my* treat. it wasn't a question (even though it was formatted that way).

gabe: i've never let anyone else buy my food. ever.

me: well, now's as good of a time as ever to start!

gabe: picture me sighing. are you picturing it? that's my message.

the light of my phone screen illuminated my smiling face. this guy was something else.

me: okay, new subject. how was your day?

gabe: really? that's the best you can come up with?
gabe: my day was boring and long. i worked. how was yours?

me: my day was fine. kinda sad, but overall fine.

i cringed as i sent the message. maybe we didn't know each other well enough to share such personal information?

gabe: why sad?

it took me a few minutes to form a reply i thought would be appropriate.

me: well i found out last night that my cousin i grew up with passed away. and i kind of just volunteered to hold a memorial for him.

gabe: oh man, that sucks. i know it doesn't mean much but i'm sorry for your loss.

me: no, it means a lot actually. thank you.

gabe: memorial you say? i could come along and help out if you want.

me: that would actually be really really helpful. but let's not make that our date 😂

gabe: of course not. what are you doing tomorrow?

me: nothing that i know of.

gabe: i'll pick you up at 11am?

me: sure. but what are we doing?

gabe: it's a surprise, of course. gotta keep you on your toes.

me: 🙄 whatever floats your boat. you're a dork, by the way.

gabe: takes one to know one.

***

this is basically just a filler chapter but we had a good little BM scene in there so <3