TRUST, harry potter¹

epilogue

'The constellations of stars

Scattered across her face

Is the map that

Guides me home

Each time I find myself lost'

||||

Through silence, she woke.

Memories were yet to remind her of the earlier tragedies, and as her eyes adjusted to the looming darkness, aided by casted moonlight, the evident, white-sheeted beds and tall, arched windows easily resembled that of the Hospital Wing. The bed on her right was occupied beneath the covers, only just recognising the distinctive bushy curls of Hermione's hair.

It was easily around 2am, all patients of the Hospital Wing sound asleep—except for her, of course, mind at peace yet muddled as to why she was there in the first place. Spying her surroundings, a small, stumpy charcoal vase caught her eye. It was sat on her bedside table, bursting with vibrant white daisies, the colour of puffy clouds on a happy spring day and the snow she wasn't allowed to go in on Christmas break.

Reaching over, she gently pulled out a small scrap of parchment that was slightly beneath the vase— so it wouldn't float away. Holding it in the moonlight, she read the note.

'wake up soon, Addie x'

Following the message were the signatures of Hermione, Ginny, Harry, Neville, Ron and Luna. She didn't know what the 'x' was supposed to mean, however Adeline didn't think too much over it as the smile she developed through reading it fell, as did the note onto the mattress as she tore away the sheets. She was still, conveniently, in her uniform from the battle, blood smeared near the collar, dust and dirt darkening the cream of her shirt. She stood, adjusting her footing as she swayed before quietly running to the exit of the Hospital Wing, slipping in her tights from not being able to find her shoes as she pushed open the grand doors and sprinted out, leaving them slightly ajar.

||||

Ad liked to run. Not athletically or just for the sake of it—she liked it because of the cool wind brushing her face, her hair flying behind her and her legs aching. As if she really could just run away from all the things hurting her, all the grief biting through her skull from remembering the battle, from, after reading the note, finally remembering the death of Sirius Black. That she could run from the guilt, a monster bearing rigid teeth. That maybe, if she were fast enough, it wouldn't be able to catch up to her and eat her out from the inside. That she could just run from the broken look in Harry's watery eyes.

But as she reached the finish line, the astronomy tower, the guilt had caught up. And she tried, oh how she tried, to swallow it down as she approached Harry—who was already leaning against the railing, looking only up, even as she joined him in silence. He noticed when she didn't stand as close as usual. She sucked in a breath, her voice so close to breaking, but she pushed it through.

"I'm so sorry... Harry, please, I didn't want it to happen, I tried to stop it as best I could but it didn't work and I just—I should've tried harder and I should've pushed through and I should've—" She was interrupted as he shrugged off his uniform robe and laid it over her shoulders, leaving him in his white shirt instead of her. Ad hadn't realised tears were spilling down her cheeks and she was freezing until the warmth encased her, hesitantly putting her arms through the sleeves that went well over her hands.

"I don't blame you." He said, but his voice sounded so close to crying—like her. "Addie, I know... I know how much you meant to him, how much he meant to you. But you scared me."

"I—"

"After you collapsed, I ran after Bellatrix. And—and I heard him. Voldemort. He appeared and then Dumbledore did too and they were throwing spells and everything but then you..." His voice cracked, nearly hyperventilating as he spoke so fast. "But then you showed up. Not you—the monster. She fought with Voldemort, under his control. And when he was gone, when he left, you changed back to you, but you weren't conscious. I ran up to you and checked your pulse because you—you weren't breathing and your pulse, your heartbeat, was gone. It's been two days, Addie...I thought—" though he didn't continue as his voice lost its sound, she knew exactly what he thought.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, standing on her tiptoes, she hugged him tightly, her own tears threatening to fall again as sobs racked his body, burying his head into her shoulder, holding on as if she would disappear right from within his arms.

"I can't lose you, too." He, voice muffled by her shoulder, spoke.

||||

"Sirius once told me that... when someone dies, they turn into a star."

The night sky was a mess of constellations—a million fireflies crammed into infinity, but there was one up there, further away from the others, that she stared. The brightest of them all, looking down on them. Harry's gaze, through his puffy eyes, moved from her to the sky and wrapped his arm around her upper back, gently pulling her into his side.

"And, well, if he's right... that star up there looks like a pretty good one."

Of course he's in grief, of course he's hurting. But as Sirius said, he needs to trust her if they ever want to win this arising war—for everyone's sake. He needs to be there and he needs to protect her, however hard it may be, and however much the world is just weighing in against them and however much the ground starts to crumble beneath their feet. He has to.

Because the hardest step she ever took, was to blindly trust who she was.

a/n:

,,I cri