Allegiant - Alternate Ending

Chapter 50 - Tris

"How did you inoculate yourself against the death serum?" he asks me. He's still sitting in his wheelchair, and I'm pinned to the ground.

I blink at him, still dazed. "I didn't," I say.

"Don't be stupid," David says. "You can't survive the death serum without an inoculation, and I'm the only person in the compound who possesses that substance."

I just stare at him, not sure what to say. I didn't inoculate myself. The fact that I'm still standing upright is impossible. There's nothing more to add.

"I suppose it no longer matters," he says. "We're here now."

"What are you doing here?" I mumble. My lips feel awkwardly large, hard to talk around. I still feel that oily heaviness on my skin, like death is clinging to me even though I have defeated it.

"I knew something was going on," David says. "You've been running around with genetically damaged people all week, Tris, did you think I wouldn't notice?" He shakes his head. "And then your friend Cara was caught trying to manipulate the lights, but she very wisely knocked herself out before she could tell us anything. So I came here, just in case. I'm sad to say I'm not surprised to see you."

"You came here alone?" I say. "Not very smart, are you?"

He grins and finally starts moving. When he moves forward I notice a black box with a silver keypad on his lap: the memory serum virus. If I move fast I might make it, but I'm not sure if he is armed. It's a risk, but I know I should give it a try.

Just when I want to take the risk, he stops in front of my feet and takes a gun from under his shirt.

"Of course I'm not alone," he says while aiming his gun at me. "I had a feeling I should have get reinforcements before I came here."

At that moment I hear footsteps, strong and hard against the ground. The door behind me swings open and I feel the pressure of the death serum against my skin. My head feels heavy while I turn around and stare into the eyes of a guard. His eyes are small and remind me of Jeanine's eyes: cold and cruel.

This is my last chance, flashes through my head. I dive forward and lash out to the black box. At that moment I hear a gunshot and I immediately feel a sharp pain through my wounded arm.

The device falls out of my hand and my sight gets blurry. Footsteps get closer and I cringe when someone grabs me. The pain shoots through my body and sets it on fire.

I can't quite see what has happened. Everything is going so fast and I feel the thread pulling again. When I try to get up, I get punched on my jaw and fall back on the ground again. The white tiles are cold and remind me of our bathroom in Abnegation, the stones at the Chasm in Dauntless. I close my eyes and get ready for another attack. But nothing happens.

I only feel like I am ascending.

Warm hands clamp around my legs and shoulders. I want to open my eyes, just so I can see who is taking me out of here, but my eyes are to heavy and so, so tired.

Eventually I give up and let it all happen. I can't do this. I think about my mother. My father. Will. Everyone who isn't here anymore and I want to see so badly. But at the same time I still have this will to live. The fire that burns in my chest. The fear in Tobias eyes when we climbed the Ferris wheel. Christina's tears when she heard I was responsible for Will's death. Caleb's shaking hands when he knew he would die because of the death serum. I can't let them feel any more fear or pain because I wasn't strong enough. I don't want that.

I can't let that happen.

But maybe I'm just not strong enough.

I feel the cold tiles against my skin again and the hands disappear. Finally I can open my eyes a little and I see the contours of a wheelchair through my eyelashes.

"It never had to come this far, Tris," David says.

Suddenly I feel something cold against my neck. I don't know what it is, but the pain in my arm, my jaw, and the pain in my whole body disappears. Just like the coldness of the tiles against my skin. I feel nothing.

It feels like a salvation, and I let myself be dragged into the darkness.