Fuck it.

Chapter 2

"Hey sweetheart how are you doing?" My mother asked me I'm to shocked to answer her question. Why is she even here she hasn't even called since I left like forever ago she left me with one bag of clothes and not even a goodbye she's a bitch. " Well are you come give me a hug?" she walk toward me with a smile but I immediately step back her smile soon seems to fade like she upset. I don't understand why ,I should be the one upset. I walk past her to get in the room. Why are you here mom?" I struggle to get the word mom out she is no mom to me all she did was give brith and I'm not sure if that's true cause I look nothing like her. She has blonde hair and green eyes while I look like my dad with my black hair and black/brownish eyes. "Well I came here to say high what's so wrong about that?"
"Um you haven't said hi in 2 years."
"Has it really been that long?"
"Ya. Mom why are you really here?" I ask getting so annoyed. "Well...." she starts "Me and Clark are moving to Arizona and we would like you to come with us to live with us again." my mom says with hope in her eyes. Is this chick high? Wait, let me rephrase that am I high I can't even understand why in the world she would want to live with this guy even after what he did to me it's like I don't even matter. " I'm not moving in with you mom I can't I have to much to loss hear." I say as calmly as I can but I know what's about to come out of her mouth won't be so subtle. " "So are you saying that your friends are more important than your family?" she asked through gritted teeth like she's about to loss it. I mean duh my friends are more important ,they've been there for me when she wasn't ,Jess and the gang are my real family. " Mom that's exactly what I'm saying." I walk over to Jess and sling my arm around her neck. " This girl is a better mom or family member than you will ever be so I suggest you leave with whoever the jackass your sleeping with now and never see me again." I smile at her and point to the door just in case she forgot where it was. "Danni ! I am your mother you will never speak to me like that I did not raise you like that." she starts towards the door." You didn't even raise me, dad did it, all you did was bang him!" I shouted I get so infuriated when I see her. she turns around and looks at me in disgust. "Wow I thought you were more decent than that, and don't ask me to come back and get you when you realized that I'm right." Is she serious? If she even knew me she would know I love to be right and will do anything to prove I'm right even if it means suffering. " Mom if you leave now..." I hold my hand in the air " I will forever hold my peace now you can leave." After that, all she does is stare and then after awhile she slams the door so hard a picture on the wall falls and starters. I look at Jess , she has a smirk in her face and all she can say is " Well, that escalated quickly.
___________________________ It's later in the evening and Jess is getting ready to go hang with the gang tonight, but me I'm going to eat a burrito and watch Gotham all night. She checks herself out in the mirror wearing her black dress with a green flannel tied at her waist. " Are you sure you will be okay here by your self ?" I stand up to walk over to her " yes." I say sort and sweet I roll my eyes at her. " Jess I love you, but you are not my babysitter." I shake her shoulders and laugh. " Besides you need to go hang with Michael and the rest of the gang and have some harmless fun." Jess looks at me with her big brown eyes and laughs really hard. " Danni when you say harmless fun you mean drugs, beer, and sex right?
"Yep, you know me so well." I say sarcastically holding my heart , Jess rolls her eyes and heads for the door, before she shuts it she says " Danni, don't do anything stupid okay? " she looks at me with pleading eyes and I know exactly what she's talking about. " No promises Jess. " I day blankly barely above a whisper looking at the floor I couldn't stand to look in her eyes. And that's when I hear the door shut quietly.
___________________________It's 2:00 am and I just have the urge I know Jess told to not do anything stupid, but ever since what happened with me and Clarke I have the dreams more often than I did before. I walk to the bathroom to look for the razor, but it looks like Jess hid it. " Shit!" I slam my hand against the wall I continue looking and then I found it under her bed I run to the bathroom and shut the door. I slide down the wall as I look at my pale stomach tears start to from in my eyes as glide the razor across it and i see the red blood slide down my stomach like rain on a widow "So beautiful. " I say to myself as I cut another time and I keep going on my arms ,legs,everywhere until I see white spots in my vision. " See...." I say to myself as I look in the mirror. I see my red eyes and the cuts on my stomach." I'm all better ...... for now." And I drop the razor and hear hit the floor.