Who I Am | #Wattys2019

Chapter 2

Saint Louis, MO

October 12th, 2000

A twelve-year old Lexi steps off the bright yellow school bus and slowly walks up concrete path to the small red house. To anyone else, it would appear warm and welcoming, but to her, it was cold and callous. Most of the kids in her class hated school, but for her it was an escape, it was this place she had to call home which she hated.

Today was the start of spring break, which meant a week stuck in this place and the dread weighs her down as she opens the front door.

"Alexandra," Lilian, her latest cream of the crop foster mother, calls from the kitchen.

She'd lost count on the number of foster homes she'd been in, but this one was by far the worst, even though she'd only been here two weeks. She slowly makes her way into the kitchen and pushes the stray strands of hair that have fallen out of her ponytail behind her ear.

"Yea ma'am," she says upon seeing the tall brunette woman in the blue dress. Lexi can smell the vodka from across the room.

"I went to gather your laundry this morning," the woman begins, anger apparent on her face, "you didn't make your bed."

"I'm sorry," the girl says quickly.

Lilian raises her right hand and comes down hard across the girl's cheek and Lexi clutches her face in pain as the woman states, "Don't let it happen again."

From outside the house, the scene is witnessed through the large kitchen window and someone lowers a camera before they turn and leave.

Later that night, Lexi sits at the desk in her room, looking in a small mirror, checking to see if there was a mark left from the slap earlier when she hears a small tap on her bedroom window. She leans over to look and sees a familiar face giving her a small smile.

Lexi stands up and walks over to open the window and the visitor doesn't enter the room, he just moves to sit on the windowsill.

"Peter," she acknowledges the older boy who looks to be anywhere from sixteen to eighteen.

"Wendy," he replies with a smirk at the nickname.

"You're late," she says as she pulls her desk chair over beside the window and sits down, folding her legs up under her.

"Sorry," he reaches over, offering the girl a Styrofoam cup, "I had to make a stop, but I brought you this."

Lexi accepts it with a little hesitation, "What is it?"

"Chocolate peanut butter milkshake," the boy replies, not telling her he had to hand deliver the photographs he'd taken earlier to child services.

She takes a sip from the straw and looks down at the dark brown wooden floorboards below her.

"Are you okay?" he questions quietly as he watches the girl.

"Always," she replies, giving a quick fake smile, "You know you show up when things are great."

"I'm serious," the boy says with concern apparent on his face.

"Then take me with you," Lexi looks at him with subtle contempt.

The boy with dirty blonde hair looks at her dejectedly, "You know I can't. My grandmother is trying, but..."

"You've been saying that for the past year," Lexi narrows her eyes at him, "what's your angle?"

"What?" he asks with confusion.

"I'm thankful," she begins quietly, as not to disturb the rest of the house, "you saved me that day on the street. Those guys would have killed me, but this coming around and finding me..." She places the milkshake down on the windowsill and stands up from the chair before she steps away from the window. "Foster home after foster home," Lexi continues, as she turns back to look at the boy who sits in her window, "I mean...at first, I thought it was nice, like you wanted to protect me, but now..." Lexi spreads her arms out beside her in frustration, "it's getting a little weird. It's been over a year, you keep saying your grandmother is trying to help get me out, but here I am. Is this a game for you, some twisted, perverted game? Are you trying to weasel your way into my pants or something?"

"No Alexandra," he says quickly, with a shake of his head, "God no...I would never do that to you."

Even at twelve, she isn't sure whether to be relieved or disappointed by that statement. He is cute, boy band cute, no doubt about it. The kind of guy other girls her age talked about all day; they scribbled Mrs. Timberlake or Mrs. Carter all over their notebooks.

"Then why are you here Peter?" she questions him as she folds her arms across her chest.

He drops his head for a moment, then glances back up at her solemnly, "It's complicated."

A door slams from inside the house which causes them to look at each other in surprise as Lexi quickly moves to the window, "You have to go."

"I'll be back for you," Peter grabs the milkshake with one hand and Lexi's wrist with the other for a split second to garner her attention, "I promise."

"You better," she replies, then gives him a soft smile before she carefully pulls the window closed so it doesn't make any noise. She jerks her desk chair back to her desk and sits down as she pretends to do homework. The door to her bedroom jerks open and Lilian stands there for a moment, checking the room before she slams the door shut.