HYYH 1 Notes (ENG)

The Topmost Floor in the City (PT2)

JiMin
15 May Year 22

Three days passed after HoSeok was discharged from the hospital. I didn't want to say goodbye, so I followed him secretly. While I kept hiding and tagging behind, HoSeok walked down the long hallway towards the door. He nonchalantly passed the line near the emergency exit, where I'd always come to a stop. Without realizing it, I stopped right there. I could take at least five more strides, but I just stood there.

HoSeok slowly reached out and
gently pushed the door open. The dazzling sunlight poured in through
the open door along with the outside air. It smelled a bit pungent but felt refreshing at the same time. The landscape on the other side of the
door washed over me. When HoSeok stepped outside, the door began to close. I could slide through if I ran
right now. The limit line, which was visible to no one but me, was still there.

I turned around. Or, I was about to
turn around when someone passed
by, shoving my shoulder hard. I fell forward onto the floor. I raised my head, still lying on the ground. I had crossed the line. The idiot was running past me, heading for the door. He was the one who had shoved me. He continued to jostle others on his way. He didn't pay any attention to them.
As he pushed the door as hard as he could, the sunlight streamed in again. He ran outside. A nurse chased him,
but he was faster. The door began to close again. I sprang to my feet. One step over my line. I took one more step forward. It was only three more strides to get to the door. But I turned around again, well aware of my limit.

A stranger already occupied HoSeok's bed. I closed my eyes but couldn't get to sleep. I couldn't help but dwell on what he'd said before he was discharged. "JiMin, let's get out of here." He wore a complicated expression that I'd never seen before. He'd never looked or sounded that way before. I was just standing there looking hesitant, not knowing how to respond. There was one more reason I couldn't stop thinking about his words. There was
an incident that occurred right before then.

I was waiting for the elevator on
the second floor where I had physical therapy. I tripped while scuffling with the idiot, and my wrist was injured and didn't heal well. I was getting impatient as HoSeok's discharge was approaching, but the elevator was stuck on the ninth floor. I thought I heard someone
calling my name just as I was thinking of taking the stairs. That someone was standing in front of the emergency exit at the end of the hallway. I couldn't quite make out who it was with the sunlight coming through the window. When I took a step forward, the person suddenly ran through the emergency exit. The person's profile came into sight momentarily, but I still couldn't recognize who it was. Who could that be? I walked towards the emergency staircase, feeling strange.

As I opened the emergency exit door and put my head in, someone passed
by quickly. I instinctively pulled my head back. We almost collided. "Mom!" Hearing the desperate cry, I stuck my head back in. It was HoSeok, frantically leaping down the stairs. And there was a woman standing at the foot of the staircase. What's all this? I stepped onto landing. HoSeok lost his footing right at that moment. I darted forward and reached out my hands without thinking and caught him. HoSeok faltered as I abruptly slowed him down, and I barely managed to keep my balance.

He didn't say anything until we had climbed back up the stairs and stepped into the fifth-floor hallway. He remained silent while we walked to
the hospital room. Then, he suddenly stopped and looked at me. "JiMin, let's get out of here." I couldn't answer. He told me firmly. "I'll come back for you." I replied, "I'm going back to the psychiatric ward in a few days."

Three days passed. I was to go back
to the psychiatric ward the next day.
I tidied up my belongings and lay
down. I tossed and turned for a while but soon dozed off.

I awoke with the sense of something falling. The hospital was a strange place, and it was hard to sleep soundly. I could feel everything around me with my eyes closed, and even the smallest sounds kept me wide awake. The hospital room was pitch dark. A breeze flew in through the open window. The curtains flapped amidst the flow of the already sultry air. The ceiling, the floor, darkness, and silence. They were all familiar.