Haunting Memories • J. Hughes

The Reading

Jacks POV
I got out of the shower and got dressed. I looked over at my desk. I grabbed the note. I was sad but I wanted to read it. I held the small package and opened it. I immediately saw Tati's favorite necklace. I held it in my hands and choked back tears. I slowly opens the note and let the tears fall as I saw her gorgeous handwriting. There were doodles on the sides of the paper, something she did when she was nervous. It made me sad that she was scared when she died. I began to read the note-

Dear Jack,
I love you forever, and I know you loved me. It's hard to say good bye and justify my reason for leaving. It's hard to say that I loved this world and everything in it, because I didn't, and that's the sad truth. Nothing in this world ever made sense to me, ever loved me or even cared. You might be the one person who actually misses me or even has any recollection of my existence at all. You have plenty other people who love you and support you. I didn't. And I guess that's why I'm now only a memory. And that's all you have now memories. I left the necklace for you, incase you wanted to remember me or something like that. I guess I felt that I didn't matter, like the world was moving without me, and it didn't care. You are the one thing I will miss and the one thing I cherished in this life, but it's hard to say I love you when you don't even love yourself.
~ Tatum

I couldn't think. She didn't think anyone loved her? Everyone loved her. She did matter she meant the world to me. I didn't know she felt she had no one who cared about her. Why did she leave if she didn't have a reason to justify it. I held on to her necklace. I didn't think twice before I put it on. I held it close and whispered "Love you forever Tati". I cried I cried until I fell asleep.

I woke up the next morning and got ready for school. I went through my morning routine like a robot. I put on I won't give up by Jason Mraz. I cried a lot but that was good I got my cries out early. I went downstairs to say goodbye to my mom brother and dad.

"Morning Honey!" Mom said

"Morning mom." I said.

"You don't have to go to school today if you don't want to." My mom said in a sweet tone.

"No I'll go it might help." I said. I hugged my mom said bye to my dad and Luke.

"Call me if you need anything." Was the last thing I heard my mom say as I walked out to my car.

I drove to school parked my car and walked inside. I went straight to home room, completely avoiding the boys and all of their calls to me. When I got to my desk I sat and held on to Tati's necklace. Patty came in and sat next to me. He was silent for a while until a girl named Cameron came in and asked him to move so she could sit in her seat.

"You can sit in mine today Cameron. I have to talk to Jack." I heard Patty say.

"Ok" she agreed.

"You ok dude, you look like you got hit by a train?" Patty asked.

I just shrugged and let my hand travel back to the necklace. Patty must have noticed because he commented "Is the Tatum's necklace? Did something happen to her." Patty asked.

I thought for a while, should I tell him what happened, he was one of my closest friends. I decided I would tell him. I slowly nodded.

"Is she ok man?" Patty asked while scooting his chair closer and putting a hand on my shoulder.

I frantically shook my head. "She-she kill-killed h-herself." I said slowly stuttering barely above a whisper. Patty looked at me with an extremely shocked expression. He leaned over and hugged me and I cried.

"I'm so sorry Jack. I know you loved her." Patty said a small tear slipping down his cheek also. I nodded and looked down holding on to her necklace.

The day went by very slowly. It came time to go lift at the practice facility I drove Patty there because he usually rides to school with Trevor. We were silent for a while.

"I'm sorry Jack." He said

"Why are you sorry" I said as we walked to the car "you didn't do anything"

"No I know I just feel bad." He said

We got to the rink after a ride in silence. I parked.

"You know their going to ask right?" Patty asked.

"Yeah I know." I responded quietly "I'll tell them when I'm ready."

"Ok just making sure." Patty confirmed.

We got inside and immediately Danny asked "How's Tatum?" While moving his eyebrows up and down like an idiot.

"Why don't you ask her!" I told Danny.

"Wait she's here!?" Danny exclaimed.

"Yeah she wanted to meet you guys so I brought her today." I said excitedly.

I looked around the corner and watched my beautiful girlfriend come around the corner. "Guys, this is Tatum!" I said.

"Hey guys it's nice to meet you. Jack tells me all about you." Tatum said.

"He talks about us now does he?" Cole questioned as he leaned on me.

"Get off me you ass!" I yelled at Cole.

"She really is as pretty as Jack says she is." Trevor attempted to whisper to Patty who laughed because everyone could hear Trevor he's not very good at whispering.

"Trev everyone can hear you!" Alex said very loudly.

Tati came over to stand next to me and I put my arm around her waist. I looked down at her and examined her features. Thank God for Luke I thought.

"Jack you good" Danny asked I looked up. I hadn't noticed I was looking down and clutching Tati's necklace. There was also a tear running down my cheek. I nodded and turned away to walk into the locker room. The boys all got ready for practice and I saw Patty look at me sadly. I looked down to the floor and grabbed the necklace. Her necklace. "Love you forever Tati." I whispered. I could swear I heard her whisper back "Love you forever Jacky."