The Umbrella Days

It Would, If You Were Smarter

"Five?" I asked wide eyed. He got off the ground and looked around at all of us, standing there with our jaws dropped.

He looked the exact same as when he disappeared. Dad had always said he would be back but it's been 17 years! Where could he have been? 

 "I'm starving!" He exclaimed, walking past us into the kitchen. We followed. 

 "What's the date? The exact date?" He asked grabbing bread, peanut butter and marshmellows.

 "The 24th" Vanya said.

 "Of?"

 "March."

 "Good."

 "So, are we going to talk about what happened?" Luther asks. "Its been 17 years!"

 "It's been A LOT longer then that" he said jumping through time and grabbing a plate before jumping back.

 "Whered you go?" Diego asked.

 "The future. It's shit by the way."

 "Called it! " Klaus exclaimed.

 "I should have listened to the old man. You I ow, jumping through space is one thing, but jumping through time is a toss of the dice." He looked at klaus, " Nice dress. "

 "Danke," Klaus said.

 "Wait, how did you get back?" Vanya asked.

 "In the end, I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time."

 "That makes no sense," Diego said.

 "It would if you were smarter."

 "How long were you there?" I asked.

 "Forty-five years give or take. "

 "So what are you saying? Your 58?" Luther asked.

 "No,my consciousness is 58. Apparently my body is 13 again."

 "How does that even work?!?" Vanya asked.

 "Delores kept saying the equations were off. Eh. Bet she's laughing now."

 "Delores?" I asked.

 He ignored the question and continued, "Guess I missed the funeral."

 "How'd you know about that? " Luther asked.

 "What part of the future do you not understand? Heart failure huh?"

 "Yeah" said Diego while Luther said,
"No."

 "Nice to see nothing's changed."

He starts to walk away but Alison asks, "Uh that's it? That's all you have to say?"

 "What else is there to say? Circle of life." He walked out of the room, going to his room he changed into his old uniform.