The Last Lap

Chapter Seven

Our town's library was not the best library, but the librarians put in the effort to keep it alive. My favorite librarian was Ms. Raymond. 

She was a short, blonde, middle-aged lady that kept her desk neat and organized as well as the rest of the building. She worked Mondays, Thursdays, and Sundays. Her fashion style was, in nicer terms, unique. She always tried out different hairstyles and different styles of clothing. Her favorite things to wear were mini skirts of various colors or patterns and solid colored turtleneck sweaters. Sometimes, if it was chilly, she wore a knitted scarf I gave her a few months after I met her. If I had an older sister I would want it to be her.

"Hello!" I loudly greeted her as we walked up to her desk. 

She frowned at me and scolded, "Don't yell in here. It's a library. Why do you have to make me be like that?"

"I'm sorry. Jia, can you go claim a desk within the stacks?" I asked her, referring to the back shelves that were usually claimed by annoying couples to make out or the other clubs that came to the library for meetings. For the most part, the library was deserted with the exception of small children on the computers or with their parents.

Ms. Raymond invited me behind the counter and made a spot for me with her ottoman placed underneath the desk. She handed me a Reese's chocolate and asked me about my day.

"Okay, so..." I started pulling my hair back in a bun before I complained, "Isaac is giving me mixed signals. Like, today for example I saw him in the hallway and we both saw each other and we walked for a bit plus art class. Later, I saw him walking to his car when I was practicing for track but he didn't say anything. I just don't know what to do about him."

"I don't know, Emmie. If he likes you, you would know. He would be doing things like waiting for you at your locker, texting you cute or funny things, or always say hi when he saw you. If a guy gives you mixed signals, then he's not into you. Take it from someone who has extensively dated," She points to herself with the books she was stacking, "If he doesn't like you, then it's his loss. You caught a fish and it wasn't benefitting you so now you have to toss it back and look for another one. One that will treat you better and give you the attention you deserve."

I started to pick up some of the books and helped her put them back where they belonged. I'd memorized them over the summer while I was volunteering. It was almost second nature and many of the books she'd been organizing were the ones I'd read over a thousand times. They were so good. Books were a great way of experiencing things second hand and not deal with the first hand consequences of making mistakes. The library was my home.

"Yeah, you're right. I'll keep you updated. How's your cat?" I asked her, changing the topic. I didn't wanna drag it on. I knew it was annoying.

"She's sick so I had to take her to the vet. She'll be fine though. Do you wanna see the newest Christmas sweater I bought her?" She pulled out her phone and brought up her camera roll. I flipped through the pictures and smiled sweetly.

"I love cats so much. I wish I could have one," I sighed. Reminded by the cute animal, I thought about the litter of kittens my grandmother had back home. They would wrestle one another underneath the balcony that my grandfather built attached to the living room. From that balcony the whole capital could be seen and you could count the amount of mosques around you from the mountains to the valleys. I felt myself sigh.

"I can't wait until you go to college. You'll have so much fun Ema!"

"I can't live on campus. I'll probably have to end up going to the state school that everyone wants to go to but instead of dorming, I'll commute."

"You need to tell your parents they can't control you. You'll be eighteen by then!"

I kept myself silent. I'd always wanted to be on my own. I'd always hoped to have a night away from the chaos I lived in but I knew it wasn't possible. I either stayed home without having to pay tuition or lived on campus with a mountain load of student loans.