Here I am! Standing stronger than ever with Victor being my backbone.
Summertime Sadness. SIKE. This is the summer approaching my freshman year of high school and I have to enjoy it while it's here. Today is the day, Victor and myself are going to the lake. You're probably wondering, "eww, why the lake?" Well truth be told, there's a event going on at the lake for incoming freshman's attending Lockhart High in the Fall.
With Victor being almost three years older than me, he knows about all the parties. Well high school parties of course. Mom is gone as always lately and I'm getting ready to meet Victor at the front of the complex.
As I stare in the mirror adoring my body, I begin to realize that I'm finally developing breast which seem to be at least a B-cup now. Wow. Look at my beautiful curves and my stretch marks. I AM BEAUTIFUL. At this point, I've allowed myself to accept my appearance because no one is going to body shame me. Slipping on some jean shorts and a see through top, there was a knock at my front door. I grabbed my bag and made my way to open the door. You will not believe who was standing right in front of me.
My rapist, the individual that took my innocence. As I stood frozen, he eyed me down before licking his lips. I hurried down the hall to my room locking the door. I pray and hope Victor walks this way just because or my mother walks through the front door. Sitting on the floor in my room in front of the door, I found myself holding my chest because my breathing was becoming irregular.
Why? How could they let him out? How did he find us? A million questions roamed my mind and I finally found a breathing pattern to stick to. Hearing things in my mother room crash and hit the floor, I stood hurrying to my room window.
As soon as I opened the window, I spotted Victor talking to a group of females outside of my building. I called his name and he immediately looked up. Climbing out of the window and onto the rain sprout, my rapist broke my room door. I hurried down the sprout to where Victor was and he just looked at me confused. I looked back up at my window and saw my rapist sticking his head out of my window. Victor fixed his mouth to ask me questions and I just grabbed his hand before dragging him towards the front of the complex.
I can't do this. Why me? Victor stopped and snatched his hand away from me. What the hell is wrong with him?
I looked Victor into his eyes and he started running back into the apartment complex. NO! I can't allow Victor to make it back to my apartment. If he does, he will kill my mother's boyfriend and I LOVE VICTOR too much to allow him to be separated from me. Did I just say I love him? How can I allow myself to fall in love with my boy bestfriend?
When I caught up to Victor, I somehow grabbed his hand and dropped to the floor, hoping that it would stop him. Victor helped me up and analyzed the tears in my eyes before kissing me on my lips. Whoa. Did Victor really just kiss me?
We turned around and walked back towards the front of the complex. Thank God. Simply because I didn't want to be around the police. As me and Victor walked to the lake, Victor and I talked about this upcoming school year. I'll be a freshman and Victor's going to be a sophomore I believe. Yes, I'll be fourteen my freshman year and Victor will be sixteen but halfway into the school year he'll turn seventeen.
The minute we arrived to the lake, my eyes saw someone that was all too familiar in my mind. My ex-crush Aaron and his girlfriend Emilia. I honestly dislike her and her presence. As I continue holding Victor's hand, I can see Aaron eyeing down Victor. Why is he so worried about who I'm with? I am not his girl and I will never be his girl. Once trust is broken, it is broken.
Summertime Happiness. That's what I'm experiencing and I'm loving it. There's currently a water balloon fight going on right now and Victor just popped me right in my back. So guess what? Karma is about to get him. Literally. His cousin Karma, through a water balloon and it popped right when it hit his neck. Karma, she's like my girl best friend I guess you can say because if I'm not with Victor I'm with Karma.
Just then Aaron, his crew, and his girlfriend approached us. Why would he even make himself this way? As I stood still, Victor stood in front of me and I just held him from behind. Aaron chuckled and his girlfriend Emilia rolled her eyes at me before walking off. I'm a lover and not a fighter, so I don't understand what her problem is with me. Do you think I could end Emilia if I really wanted to? As a matter of fact, nevermind because she's honestly not worth it.
Karma followed after Emilia and punched her. Not only was Karma kicking Emilia ass but Aaron pushed Karma off of Emilia and Victor wasn't having that. Victor and Aaron began fighting. I didn't know what to do, simply because they weren't just fighting over Karma and Emilia. The fight was really over ME. I just don't understand how you can fight over someone that YOU ruined your chance with.
A big Lost. What can I say Victor stood his ground and showed Aaron that we are not the ones you want to fuck with. I found myself hugging Victor and kissing his perfectly shaped lips. He groaned in pain because his lip was busted and he did have a bruise on his cheek. At least, he doesn't look as bad as Aaron does right now. My best friend messed Aaron up.
Karma laughed and shook her head as I examined Victor's face. Just then Karma said, "Can you two date already? I'm tired of watching you two act like you don't feel for one another." I mean Karma's right. Both me and Victor are single, it's just we don't know how we'd be able to live if we didn't work out. We've been friends for so long that we don't want to ruin the friendship that we have just to build a relationship.
MUSIC. You can hear from a mile away if you're a true music head. I love music and it helps relax my mind. As, I rock my hips into Victor's, I found myself holding him in ways never done before and vice versa. It's kind of getting dark and I should probably head home. Maybe thirty minutes or so later, me, Karma, and Victor made our way home. When I got home, Me and Victor saw my mother's car. He stayed downstairs while I went upstairs. I hope and pray that he isn't here still. When I walked into the house, my mother and my rapist were sitting in the living room talking. Why the hell was she talking to him? Why is he still here?
I hurried down the hall to my room locking it before showing a wooden chair underneath the door knob. I packed a duffel bag and a backpack filling it with all three of my journals. Before throwing the bags out of my window, I grabbed a picture of me and my sister off of my dresser. I called Victor's name and he caught both bags before I made my way down to him. We looked around before hurrying to his place, where his drunk dad was sound asleep on the couch as usual.
