Canorous

Fourteen

Warning: Self-induced abortion

Read at your own risk. If this bothers you, you are free to skip this chapter. If you will read this chapter, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Mikasa's heart was racing. When she pulled her curtains apart to enjoy the sunlight, she met horror. It was not really as horrifying but to her, it was.

She saw Eren and the squires he was with. They seem to be waiting for something or someone. She panicked more when someone nearly saw her looking out from her bedroom window and she quickly let go of the curtain as she hoped that people should just mistake her for a ghost.

She was happy to see Eren, she really was but in a situation she was in, it was sickening. A knot of worry and panic wrenched in her stomach as she paced frantically around the room. She was sweating and she kept rubbing her hands together in search for comfort and warmth.

She bit her lip and she began to taste blood in her mouth.

Think! Think! Think!!! She chanted in her mind as she began to nibble her nails. Her heart was hammering through her chest. It was so fast that she could feel her ribcage rattling with every beat.

No one else knew that she was here except for Martha. No one else knew what she was going through except for Martha and that somewhat relieves her but it was not sufficient enough to balm the terror she is undergoing. Everyone will just find out in the end...

She felt like an ant under a boulder's pressure. Is this how Atlas felt when he carried the weight of the world?

Finally, an idea came up. She ran to the closet, nearly tripped but she managed to get back up and scramble her way to closet. She threw the door open and grabbed a coat hanger. A wire coat hanger. She held unto it tightly as she scurried the cabinets for a pair of scissors. After she found a huge tailor's scissors, she began sharpening the end of the coat hanger with it. The sounds that remained present in the room was the sound of metal scraping another metal and her pants.

Her idea was crazy. Too crazy. It would not guarantee anything and could harm her as well but she had no other choice.

The best excuse she could make up is that she should get rid of the source of her problem and the source of her problem is the child.

The scraping sounds went on for minutes and it stopped when Mikasa deemed the end of the wire to be sharp enough.

It would be sharp enough to tear flesh.

She removed several layers of her clothing and dropped them to the floor. She took a fistful of her dress and stuffed it in her mouth so that it would muffle her screams.

She gripped the hanger as her hands began to shake. She had to do this. This is the only chance she has...

She closed her eyes as she felt the cold steel touch her flesh and she hissed as she felt the sharp end of the hanger pierce a tiny bit of her flesh. She bit hard on the cloth that she stuffed in her mouth as she began tearing herself up...as she began tearing the child up.

She was not sure if it was working but she just wanted to kill it. She...she does not want the child and she does not want it to live. It would be a burden for her and the child would live in agony. Tears of pain began to stream down her face as she willed herself to control the hanger to dig deeper into her, praying that it will pull the small child out of her womb and rip it apart to flesh, blood, and entrails.

Blood was dripping, tracing her legs and she began to tremble as she began to feel the sharp pain that she induced to herself.

She wanted to stop but a ringing voice in her head kept saying that if she would not do this, then she would suffer and so will the child, therefore; it's better to kill the child.