The Healing Heart

Change of Heart?

I'm in town gathering lumber, putting it in the back of my truck. I make my way through bumper to bumper traffic, by this point, I am in a pretty foul mood. Finally making it to the house, I pull around back. As soon as I get out of the truck, Alex comes out of the house.

"Do you think the floor will be done today?" Alex took personal time off at work to watch over me. We decided to build onto the house and link tunnels from the basement to the underground bunkers.

"Yes, and I think you will love it." I smile softly.

A month of work goes by keeping my hands busy. Anything to keep me out of my own head. It seems even with Were blood my mental illness still shines through.  Weeks after finishing my home I just layed around.  No bathing, no cleaning, and hardly eating; usually waiting till evening to nibble. I became one with the couch and my dreams.  I felt at my happiest when my mates were near, but even then I felt alone, alienated.

Looking at my Seroquel in the cabinet I take it. Another couple of weeks go by taking my meds, but it doesn't seem to work. It has only made me more angry and anxious. My legs won't stay still and worse, I'm losing control of my spirit.

 Alex goes back to work reluctantly, but straight home every day. Seeing the concern on her face made me feel worse. I was ashamed I couldn't pull my own head out of my ass. Hell sometimes just moving around made me miserable.

Time creeps up and before I know it we are 30 days from the festival. I have not been answering my phone. I merely just look at it and if one of my mates are nearby they would answer.

Monday:

"Ring!" Bast answers my phone almost instantly. After a moment I hear Rye's voice on the other end of a conversation. "What is wrong with her? It has been over a full moon since I've heard her voice!" Bast stands up and motions Lilith to take her place.

Tears roll down my face as another wave of deep sadness hits me. Lilith wraps her arms around me, my head lays on her baby bump and for a moment a strong love hits me. The bond with my unborn children.

I start crying again this time happy tears. I fall asleep last hearing Bast close the door behind her.

"Hey. Sleepyhead." Shylo is kneeling toward the couch to get to face level while placing a hand on the back of my shoulder.

I slowly turn my head, but my body stays facing the back of the couch. "What is it, Shylo?" My voice sounds flat with lack of emotion.

"Now, now. Remember my Hare? You have an appointment with Lia today." Her voice is so different from her commanding tone used on the base.  "Someone will be back before you know it."

We head towards the underground lab were Lia was already waiting. I sit down silent. Do you feel it? My head pops up with a sudden focus given back to me. I suddenly notice tubes full of dark blue liquid.

"Dart, please don't be alarmed we were trying to figure out the best way to tell you without you being too concerned." Her eyes stay focused on me as she speaks. " When I took your sperm to fertilize eggs for the rest of our community, I found that in my haste I was not prepared for the possibility of some eggs having rapid growth after being in touch with your fluids."

"A sudden rage fills me. "Who has been mothering my children if they are in tubes!" My hand starts to shake as it balls into a fist.

"M-my love.." Lia's voice starts to Trimble then goes very soft at the end. "I have.. I couldn't leave them alone." She looks down at the floor.

"Dart our Lia has been most loyal to you. Even I can't persuade her to leave this room." She smirks proudly.

"However your loyalty seems misplaced, Shylo, You should have told me." I glared at her and without thinking I pull Lia to me giving her a solid hug. "How many?"