A fire's shadow: Fading

Shadow's inner thoughts

After coming back from the bar that night Shadow didn't go to bed, despite the fact that Kai told him to. Instead, he was standing out on the deck, staring at the moon. And that's when the voice came back.

You can't keep denying who you are, Shadow. You are a monster, you always have been. A child of darkness. You can never fit in with everyone else because they weren't destined to be monsters the way you were.

"I already know that I'm a monster, there's no point in denying it anymore."

"Do you still believe that stupid shit!?" A rather angry voice said from behind him.

Shadow didn't turn around, he didn't have to, so he just lowered his head, staring at the city below him.

"DO YOU!?" The voice shouted and Shadow could almost picture Kai's expression at this moment. His eyes, full of disappointment and anger, glaring daggers at him.

"Yeah, but what else am I supposed to do, Kai. All I ever do is mess everything up."

"No, you don't! You've saved so many people, whether it's from life-threatening situations or just bullies, you are a hero."

Shadow chuckled sadly, "We both know the truth here, Kai. I've made more messes than I've fixed. You remember Logan.....rigth?......"

The brunette fell quiet for a moment, his anger fading away and being replaced with something else, something he really didn't like or could explain. ".....How could I ever forget......what he did to you.....it's stuck in the back of my head.....I've never been able to forget even the smallest detail about it.....but what does he have to do with this?"

"It was my fault all that happened." The black-haired male said bluntly not less than a second after Kai finished speaking. He had already known what his brother was going to ask.

His brother opened his mouth about to respond but Shadow interrupted him, once again, he already knew what Kai had been about to say, "And don't even try to say it isn't, because we both know it is. Logan was mad at me, and it was my own fault I got captured in the first place. It was my fault you weren't there for that mission, it was my fault you weren't on guard enough to notice the man that came at you with a knife....it was my fault..............it is all my fault....." The edgy ninja shut his eyes tight and clenched his fists, feeling guilt mixed with anger boiling up inside him.

Silence fell between them for a while until Kai spoke up again, "Do you really still think you're a monster?"

Shadow didn't respond at first, he just turned his head away from his brother, staying silent until the red ninja repeated the question, then the taller ninja turned his head to the brunette but kept his gaze towards the floor, "I keep messing things up, putting people in danger, why would I not be a monster. I thought I could change, but no matter what I do, I still end up causing pain and destruction wherever I go."

The brunette placed a hand on his brother's shoulder, "Shadow, I never saw you as a monster, and I never will. In my eyes, you are the most heroic person out of everyone in Ninjago. You changed who you were in order to protect others, and have risked your life for people you didn't even know. I don't get why it never seems to get into that skull of yours that you are not a monster, you are a hero."

Shadow stayed silent, in truth he knew why the words never stuck. It was because of the voice in his head that always talked back at the words his family and friends gave him. No matter what anyone said, he knew that he just mess things up. "It doesn't really matter what I am. In the end, I'm still just going to mess things up like I always do." At first, the black-haired male didn't realize what he had said until Kai violently grabbed his shoulders and turned the edgy ninja towards him.