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At nights, I hear their screams.
It's the middle of the night. Piled under dense layers of quilts, I lay on my back. My teeth dither. One moment, the world is still and silent; the next, their words pound against my skull.
Stay, they said. No, such a word doesn't begin to describe the intensity of what happened. They implored that I stay. I should've heeded to their pleas. If I hadn't left, the screams wouldn't daunt me every night. But it was too late.
The duskiness bathes over me. There's a tightness in my chest refusing to unwind. Pangs lace across my temples. A stabbing pain ambushes my stomach. Cold tears march down my cheeks. Plaints ring against my throat.
No.
In the agony that hums against my ears, I identify each voice. Then, I roll onto my stomach. My sobs are at the top of my lungs. The tears stream down my face like a river. I cling to my pillow and bury my face in it. It muffles the wails.
I emit every inch of my energy into the pillow. Soon, I'm hiccuping and gasping for air. I pause for a moment. Silence lurks through the air. And then, I hear a soft, female voice.
Anything is plausible when there's a pause in time.
I was practically raised on this phrase. I know it by heart. Before, I utilized it as a way to cope; now, it's a reminder of the hell I bred.
I was responsible for the screams, for my pain, for the chaos.
I am a beast.
I am a hybrid.
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— Shay <3
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