the seecrets of my soldier .

new boy

Octavia's pow

I hate school . It is full of confusing , loud , emotional and demanding people , and the teenagers are eeven worce . It wasets time teatching us stuf we dont need to now , and the things we actualy need to lern gets sped up . Atleest evereyone here is hiding there identaty like me . Kind gerls pretending to be bad gerls , bad gerls pretending to be kind . Poor pretending to be ritch and ritch pretending to be better . Geeks pretending to be cool , sportsboeys pretending to be smart . It seems that i am the onley one here pretending to be shy .

I use school to work on my smaller skills the fine tune skills needed for cover . I teatch myself difrant handwrighting and wrighting with my left . I work on my pcykolagy by studying the other children . My acting gets perfekted as i pretend to be a shy , skared gerl that kant do eneything herself. That is my cover here . The invisable gerl to shy to look enneyone in the yeys , a gerl whoos grades are good enuf to not look bad but bad enugh to not get atention . I alsow sometimes work on my sotial skills , but i kan onley pretend to like the konversation. Noone here is actualy worth my time , they are all worthless people qluless of the real world . At brake i do my homework sothat i kan do something more produktive at home . I onley di my homework to keep out of trouble , tho it is a waset of time . I hate it .

Home , that term i have never used bevore . It seems rong to use it . I live there , but i dont have a home . People say that home is where you belong . But i dont belong there . Shure i enjoey living there , but one alsow enjoeys a vakation . I dont belong with someone like Henry, someone as soft as him . Yes he is a sholdier and hase killed , but he is still soft . He kares about things i wuld never eeven dream of karing about , like a strange child who stomped a toe , or a begger with sunburn . I dont belong in a place where people do not fear or dominate me . But i shure as hell won't leeve . Yes , i am supressed and kontroled . I am kept from my potential and my desire for aktion . I long for my old life , where i was trained daily and my needs where filled . My mind never stoped working there and i kuld always count on something to happen . I was always taught something new , and noone ever tried to stop me . Those i dident like i kuld kill . But there i was always under the shaddow of the one who made me. He was my master and mentor . He trained and hurt me to make me better . He is the onley man i fear , but he hase my deepest respect aswhell . With all that , it took me a while to relise that i dident belong there ether . Shure it was perfect for me , keeping me busy whith produktive things and giving me what i want. But there was something rong , something missing that i now i once had . I relised that when i killed the onley person who was ever kind to me .

I moove my thoughts to the side as i notice a new boey in the class . Doing the usual , i give him a one over and then agayn . He is tall and well bult , with brown hair and big ears . His school uniform is unneet , and his tie is loos . His features make him quit an atraktive jung man with his brown yeys that matches mine and his set law and hit me smile . But there is something elce about him that makes me want drown him . He hase a mischevius glint in his yeys and his smile reatches the tops of his cheeks . But that is not it . I dont now what is , but i intend to find out . He just made it too my stalk list .

He skans the room karefully and his yeys land on me , strangley so since i am almost never noticed . I kwikley look down and akt like i am to shy to keep eyekontakt . He mooves to an open seat three seats from me and the teacher komeas in. I can still feel his yeys on me tho , whay was he watching me of all people ?

The teatcher stops and sets some boocs on her desk . Her thinn frame with glases to thick for her small haid bothers me for some reson . That cant be practikal in enney way . Noticing him standing there she smiles , calls him farward and intreduces him as Rouen . Apparantley he is a boy who went to this school for a vew years and left a year ago deu to his fathers work , but now he is back . That is intresting information .