My Sister's Keeper

25

I love you. 

It's surreal how much meaning can be placed into those three words. How some people can hesitate so much to say those three words.

My best friend said those words to her boyfriend of less than one month without any hesitation. My friend and I were conflicted. We could never say that so soon. I see it in her face: she's happier now. She spent her life feeling alone because she had to take care of herself and everyone around her, with no one to take care of her. She wanted someone to take care of her, and she found that person in Starboy.

I have always been afraid of being alone. Maybe it's because I spent the majority of my life feeling alone when there was no one else besides 'them' and 'me'. Maybe its because I was left to fend for myself in a place where the majority of the people were incompassionate. Maybe its because when I thought I had found friends there, they throw havoc.

"I love you," I said and then regretted it because I know that means I'm letting myself care for someone who will most likely leave me for their boyfriend or for someone more important.I love you. You say. Then hesitate. Because love isn't something that grows instantly. Maybe it does. Maybe if it's with the right person. I love you. But maybe you don't have to say those words. Maybe it's a "wear a seatbelt" or a "eat lunch with me" or someone offers you their cookie. Maybe it's in the little things too, not just the big three words that define so much.

-

Jo had a feeling she knew why Alex's younger sister was standing in her loft. She had heard in the grapevine (Arizona) that Alex had lost and was losing his sister to social services.

The system was so corrupt. She had seen it time and time again. Too many kids. Not enough homes. The homes that were taking only did it for the check, not the child. They were abused, misused, and unloved.

If Amber Karev was there to ask for her help, she was damn straight going to give it to her.

"Hi, Amber. What's up?" Jo started.

Amber swallowed. "I need your help. And I know you and Alex have a history but if you tell him I'm here it will ruin everything for both of us. You told me you lived out of your car. Is there something like that that I could do? I didn't want to take any money from Alex, so I have like three hundred bucks... my emergency money. I think that is enough to buy a clunker. And if I got a job, waitressing or whatever, that would be enough for food and saving. And when I turn eighteen I can go back to Alex. I know it sounds crazy-"

"It's not crazy." Jo started, cutting her off. She sat down on the edge of her couch. "You're right. But you can't live out of your car." She had had her car windows smashed, her safety violated, and all of her money stolen. She was not going to let that happen to this kid.

"It's not like I can afford anything else!" Amber argued back.

Jo didn't hesitate in her next statement. "Stay here with me."

Amber's eyebrows dropped. Why were all of the people on the west coast, both Seattle and LA, so nice to her? They were willing to feed her and put a roof over her head even though they didn't know her. Mer. Jo. All because she was Alex's family. Alex meant so much to everyone there. "Jo, I know I came here for your help, but that's too much."

"It's what you just said, you came here for my help, and this is me helping you. No buts."

-

Meredith practically ran up the steps to Joel's apartment, banging on the door. A pale and sick looking Cassie answered the door. She looked at the woman standing there in shock.