𝔩𝔞𝔳𝔢𝔫𝔡𝔢𝔯 𝔩𝔬𝔩𝔩𝔦𝔭𝔬𝔭𝔰 (𝔰𝔥𝔲𝔮𝔦) ✓

lost

two

yuqi pov

sprinting through the hallways to get to history on time, i burst through the door just as the bell rings. i make my way to my desk panting and out of breath, sweat dripping (dripping love) down the side of my face.

i accidentally slept in this morning, my shrill alarm doing nothing to shake me out of my deep slumber.

i sigh and drag my hand through my slightly damp locks. rustling though my bag, i search for the sweets that will get my hands to stop shaking, my breathing to even out.

but they're not there.

panicking, i look through every pocket in my bag. i even flip through my binders to see if any got stuck in one of them, to no avail.

taking a couple deep breaths, i try to make sense of my racing thoughts. the constant fear of what would happen if i went back to cutting is taking over my brain, and i squeeze my eyes closed.

i can't think about this now. i just need to get through this class, then i can go find miyeon. i know she keeps a stash of lollipops in her bag for me. just get through this next hour.

my leg can't stop shaking, bouncing up and down and causing my desk to shake. i know i can't last much longer like this. as i feel my breathing become shallow and irregular, i stand and bolt out of the classroom, ignoring the stares and mouthing 'panic attack' at my teacher.

running towards the washrooms, i rush into a stall and completely break down. why, why now? why am i so weak that i can't get through one class without a stupid lollipop? i'm a failure, who isn't smart enough, pretty enough or nice enough.

i hear the bathroom door creak open, and only then do i realize that i'm full-on sobbing, tears streaming down my cheeks. my hands are shaking, and my vision is blurred from how hard i've been crying. i try to cry softer, unable to get a full breath in.

shuhua pov

when yuqi practically sprinted out of the classroom, visibly hyperventilating, i knew that something was off. she looked like she was having a panic attack. i know all the signs because of my best friend, soojin. she's always suffered from debilitating anxiety, and reading the signs helps me catch the breakdown before it happens.
i've sat with her countless times as she tried to stop her tears and erratic breathing.

and i knew what would happen if no one went after her.

i'm already halfway to the front of the lecture hall before i realize what i'm doing, and the teacher waves at me to go find yuqi.

damn, i love mrs. chen.

carefully pushing open the bathroom door, i hear sobs echoing through the small room. they quiet just barely as i slip into the room, and i try to come up with something to say.

"are you okay?"

i finally whisper, then immediately mentally slap myself. for god's sake shuhua, do you even have a brain? get it together, she's obviously not okay, she's sobbing. idiot.

the only sound i can hear is shaky breathing, and then i actually slap my palm into my forehead. of course. when you get a panic attack, it's hard to breathe, never mind talk.

"i'm coming in, okay?"

a/n
and i oop-

GET READY FOR SOME SERIOUS FLUFF YALL ITS GONNA BE WILD