hide and seek

15

Nako's P.O.V

"Nako, are you sure about this?" Chaeyeon asked while she watches me pack my stuff. "Yep!" I stopped for a moment and gave her a smile.

"Okay..I guess.." Chaeyeon sighed. "I'm just going to prepare dinner." She added. Before she could leave the room I called her. "Chaeyeon, can I borrow your phone?" I asked.

Chaeyeon looked confused. "Why? For what?" She asks. "Just let me borrow it. It'll only take a second." I said. "Okay, just don't go through my messages!" Chaeyeon said squinting her eyes at me.

"Suree." I laughed. When she left my room, I opened her phone and went through her contacts. I deleted my phone number and entered Jaemin's number. I saved it as 'Nako-chan'.

—•—•—•—

"Nako! Long time no see." Mina greeted me with a hug. "I missed you!" I said hugging her back. When we separated from the hug she pointed her index finger at me. "Momo told me about Renjun." She said.

"I told you he's no good." She smirked. I tried to smile when I heard his name. "Maybe I wasn't enough..Maybe it was my fault.." I said.

"NOOO!" Mina said placing both of her hands on my shoulder. "You know what? I'll help you forget him." Mina added. "But first, shall we get lunch? I'm hungry." She said showing her gummy smile.

"Of course!" I said.

—•—•—•—

Day 23 and I still want you.

I closed my journal after writing the last sentence. I fell back on my bed and covered my eyes with my arm. The room was silent and only the noise from the air conditioner surrounds the room.

"I miss you.." I muttered as tears escaped my eyes. This feeling..it's so heavy. I tried my best to not make any noise as my tears fall uncontrollably, holding back my sobs felt like I had thorns on my throat.

It hurts. It hurts so much.

"Nako?" I stopped crying when I heard Mina call my name. "You in there?" She said knocking on the door. "Yep, one minute." I said running to the bathroom to wipe my tears and wash my face.

I opened the door while I was wiping my face with a towel. "You need anything?" I asked Mina, looking completely fine. "Wanna go out? Let's go eat some ice cream and shop!" She cheerfully asked.

I should distract myself.. "Sure!" I answered back with the same energy. "Okayy! Let's get dressed." She said running back to her room. I smiled bitterly when she closed her door.

I miss being genuinely happy.

—•—•—•—

"That movie was so heartbreaking.." Mina said placing our ice creams down on our table. "Yeah.." I said agreeing. "It's sad how the male and female protagonist didn't end up together.." She added.

"But they did get a closure." I said. "Yeah, through a letter." She sarcastically said. "That's better than nothing at all." I retorted.

"Whatever.." Mina rolled her eyes. I looked around the ice cream parlor and saw a small stationary stand in the corner. "Excuse me, I'm just gonna check something out." I said. Mina hummed in response.

I checked the cute stationaries and one thing caught my eyes. It was a set of cute vintage envelopes. I remember when Renjun was courting me he used to give me letters everyday. It looked exactly like these.

"I'm gonna buy this one." I said to the lady.

As I was walking back to our table, an idea popped in my head.

—•—•—•—

Every day I would write one letter for the people I loved and cared for, but for the last eleven days I only wrote letters for him.

I finished the last one and sealed the envelope. "Please separate this two stacks of letters." I said to the mailman. "This one send this on the 14th, this one on the 23rd." I said first pointing to the letters for my friends and then Renjun's.

—•—•—•—

I took a deep breath and looked at the sunset infront of me. My peace was destroyed by a phone call. "Mina.." I muttered seeing the caller's name. "Hey, what's up?" I asked.

"Hey, I might come home late later. You can buy food with the money I left in the counter." Mina said. "It's fine. I used the money already to buy lunch." I giggled.

"Yabuki.." Mina growled. "I'm going somewhere so you might not see me later. I left the change on your bed though." I said.

"And where are you going?" Mina asked. "You sound like my mom." I scoffed. "I'm going to a happy and peaceful place, Mina." I said softly. My eyes slowly becoming blurry because of my tears.

"Oh, I see. You have fun. Take care, okay? I'll see you in the morning." Mina said.

She didn't get the hint..

"Thank you, Mina." I said.

"Stop being dramatic, Nako-chan. Wait, call you back later I have workkk." She said ending the call.

I looked around and admired the place. I'm now standing alone at the edge of a high rock. It's so peaceful here. The waves sounds so beautiful and calming.

I wanna hear it for the last time.

It's time to end the pain. There is no other way. I know this is a selfish act, but isn't it more selfish to force someone dead inside to keep living?

I'm tired. My heart can't take it anymore, it's suffocating me everyday. It's slowly killing me.

Goodbye to this unbearable pain.

Goodbye to the people I failed.

Goodbye, Huang Renjun.

I closed my eyes and slowly took steps forward.

"Until we meet again.." I whispered.