"Billie..." I trailed off as I saw her sitting on my chair once more, her lips dry and her hair in a tangled mess. Her cheeks were wet with tears as she sniffed, her hand coming up to her nose wiping off some snot.
"They're going to kill me, Kenned...
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"And it's not just you and me, the whole youth is depressed Living with the devil, constant battle every day Wake up, gotta talk to people but I don't know what to say"
070 Shake- I laugh when I'm with friends but I'm sad when I'm alone
I wiped the lone tear that trickled down my cheek. My mother wasn't disappointed in me, right?
She loves me. She said so herself.
"I love my daughter very much. Billie is like...she's something and I'm happy that she's in my life. Billie-"
SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU!
"Sh-She wants me"
Your worthless.
You should've take more pills
"I should've taken more pills" I whispered.
Your should've died. No one wants you.
My body suddenly started ticking and I tried my best to calm myself down but the voices just got louder and louder until I couldn't take it anymore.
I screamed, pulling the roots of my hair. Physical pain. Emotional pain. I was mental.
"Mommy!" I screamed as I kicked my feet up. The tears made me see blurry but I could hear the room door as it opened and the amount of feet came rushing in.
"Restrain her" I heard a woman say as I watched blurry figures move about.
I felt a grip on my arm but I pulled away only to be held again, even tighter as my body was forcefully pushed down onto the bed.
"Let me go!" I screamed, my voice cracking in the process. "Mommy!" I called again and I tried to wiggle put the persons hold.
"Billie calm down, your mom isn't here" The soft voice said but I ignored her, calling again.
I threw my arms about holding onto someone and pushing the away, attempting to get up.
My feet where hurting because I've been in here for about two weeks without anything to protect my feet and it pained me to walk sometimes.
"Hold her!"
They don't love you
They never did
Your just a waste of space
I felt a hand on my shoulder and quickly pushed the person back, running out the room, tears still falling down.
I instantly heard a siren as I turned the corner, not knowing where I was going. My heart beat out of my chest. I was scared.
"Patient 356 has excaped" I heard on the announcement making me run faster.
Kill yourself
I pushed open the double doors that where surprisingly opened and ran out into the cold night air. I hadn't been out side in a while and I missed it.
I heard the faint whaling of the siren as I ran down the cold concret sidewalk.
I breathes in heavily as I kept on running. I noticed the familiar signs and buildings and I could go home from here. It wasn't far. But I couldn't go home.
She's disappointed
No one wanted me.
No one loves me. If they see me, they'd call the cops without hesitation.
"Billie Eilish was sent into a Rehabilitation Center–"
They don't like me anymore.
Die
"Give it up for Billie Eilish everybody!"
"Your so young and talented-"
"Your iconic"
I covered my ears, the loud noises making me irritated.
"Your my friend-"
"Is it Eyelash?"
"Your songs are so dark yet bright-"
Billie Eilish
Billie Eilish
Billie Eilish
Garbage!
I jolted up in my bed, feeling the sweat run down the side of my face. I breathed in and out making sure to calm down before I had a meltdown.
It was only a dream.
Calm down Bill.
"Billie"
I shot my head to the side only to find Kennedy watching me worriedly. Her hair was out today which looked nicely on her while she wore all black with a blue and white necklace.
"Are you okay?" She asked and I shook my head instantly gulping.
"When can I die?"
When I die, you will love me.
_________________
"And they tellin' me get off my ass, I was born on the wrong path (yeah, mmm) And I'm tryna solve these problems, but I was always bad at math (mmm, yeah) And your voice has made it harder, and that's just honestly I had to shoot up to my brain to become the person that I wanna be"
