Not your average Love Story

0.3

I wake up and it's Friday already. I have a nervous and hopefulness feeling in my stomach. Maybe today will go the way I want it. I hope. I really do hope and as I hope I get ready for school.
But school seems to drag on and on and on. I'm anxious and I'm nervous as each minute slowly goes by. I have a knot in my stomach, jitters in my bones, and I feel the bile in my throat. I just want school to be over already so I can get this over with.
~~
I get home and start getting ready. I wash my hair, dry it, and leave it down. He likes it when it's down because it's so long. I pull some jeans on that compliment my features and a shirt that does me justice. I put mascara on and lipstick. I look in the mirror and I feel good. But there is something in my mind that doesn't feel right. I hope it's just nothing though.
I get in my car and turn on some music. It doesn't help me because my mind just keeps wandering all over the place. I keep making up scenarios that could happen which is only making me even more anxious. I take a deep breath and let it go hoping it will help me calm my nerves, but it doesn't. Maybe the car ride up there will help.
When I pull up Mikey is already waiting for me in his car. I hope he hasn't been waiting long, but then again he's always early and I'm always late.
Mikey: Hey you ready to go?
I step out the car and nod my head.
Mikey: I know y'all will work it out. So don't stress lil' sis.
I just pinch my lips and get into his car without saying a word.
Mikey is Marcus' older brother. He agreed to meet me and pick me up so I wouldn't have to drive an hour away where they live to watch the game and to talk after.
Deep down I know he offered to drive me so I wouldn't have to drive all the way back home upset if things don't work out between Marcus and I. Knowing this makes me even more upset and shaky which isn't helping my anxiety. I begin to bite the inside of my lip which is something I do often when I'm concentrating or when I get anxious.
He looks over at me.
Mikey: Hey don't stress lil' sis. We're going to watch his game then after we'll head to the house and that's when you can finally talk. If it helps I know he's just as nervous as you.
I look at him with a little spark of hope.
Me: Really? Has he said anything to you about us? Or has he told you anything that's been on his mind?
He sighs and stays quiet for a while. I wait with pleading eyes for him to say something, anything.
Mikey: I can't tell you that sis. He's going to have to tell you that himself.
I sigh and look out the window. We're both silent for the rest of the ride.
~~
We walk into the stadium and go to the visitor side even though it is at their home field. It's just what we always do when we come to watch his games. I smile at the thought, but then the pit in my stomach grows as I wonder to myself: Is this going to be the last time this season I come to this stadium? Or even this city, ever? I stop smiling quickly and take my seat.
The game begins shortly after we arrive. I barely cheer for Marcus and I just sit and watch in silence. I take in every moment and before I know it the buzzer for the end of game sounds.
Mikey: C'mon lets go.
Me: Hang on, are we not going to wait for him to ride with us back to your guys house like we usually do?
Mikey: No. He drove himself today. We're going to head home and you can wait for him there.
His answer leaves me speechless and I slowly get up from my seat as I watch Marcus walk off the field and into the locker room. My heart slowly seeps into my stomach and I've bit my lip so much on the inside it's beginning to bleed a little.
~~
Mom: I just want you to be careful on your way home. I didn't tell your dad where you went because I know he likes to meddle about these things. You better be home soon, or your dad isn't going to be happy. I know I gave you permission, but I'm just worrying.
Me: Mom I know. I'll
be home soon, but I don't know where he's at. He should be here already and it's sort of upsetting me. It's been almost 30 minutes since his game has finished and the school isn't that far from his house. I'm starting to stress out.
Mom: Don't worry baby. He'll be there soon. Let me know when you're about to leave. I'll stay up until you get home. I love you so much. Please no matter what happens stay strong for me.
Me: I will mom. I promise I'll try.
*thud*
I turn and sit up from his bed and see Marcus slouching in the doorway. He set his bag down which had made the loud thud. I quickly get off the phone with my mom and sit there waiting for him to start the conversation. I start to open my mouth, but nothing comes out.
Me: I-I-I'm so confused. I just want to know what's going through your mind and I want us to talk about this maturely, but I can't be the only one putting that effort in. Please let's just work this out. Please.
He sighs and sits on the other side of his bed. The silence is crippling and seems to go on for an eternity before he finally says something.
Marcus: I want this to work too. That's why you're here. That's why I'm here. I'm willing to make this work.
My heart leaps out of my chest and my body floods with happiness.
Me: You mean it? You really do?
Marcus: Yes Ari-bug. I do mean it. I was on that field and all I could think about was you. How much I would miss your voice cheering me on and how much I'd miss holding you at night. I don't want us to end. I want us to work out. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I know we're only in high school
and there's so much in the future for
the both of us, but I want to spend it together. Not apart.
I smile super big and give him the biggest hug and kiss.
Marcus: Stop it I'm sweaty.
He laughs as I drown him with tiny kisses all over his face.
Me: I don't care. That hasn't stopped me before and it won't stop me now.
I smile and hold his face in my hands.
Marcus: I love you.
Me: I love you.
Marcus: Forever?
Me: Forever.
Before I know it, we are kissing each other deeply. Slowly taking each other's clothes off. Taking in each other's features and body's. We go slow which makes it even better. The teasing and the love is there, and let me tell you if anyone would have seen us they would've seen it too.
~~
That night in the car with Mikey I have the biggest smile on my face and my heart is full.
I can't help but glow with happiness and positivity. I hoped this night would go well, but I didn't know it would go this well.
Mikey: From the looks of it. I think it's safe to say this night went well.
I beam and nod my head frantically.
Me: You were right. I had nothing to stress about. It all worked out. We're going to make it work. Thank you so much for everything. You're the best big brother ever.
He smiles and thanks me.
Mikey: Yeah. I wouldn't trade you for the world lil' sis.
For the rest of the ride home we talk about mine and Marcus' future together and that night when I get home I can actually sleep peacefully knowing Marcus is still mine.
~~
But I only wish that this was how the night played out, but it wasn't. This was actually the exact opposite of how this night played out. This was only a fantasy I pictured in my mind right before I saw Marcus standing in his doorway with tears falling down his eyes. That's when I knew he had made up his mind about us and that's when I knew I'd lost him forever.