Trapped in the Closet

🎶Happy Anniversary Batsy Bae🎶

Batman's POV

I have a lead on The Joker's whereabouts, a small, but crucial detail in the recording Joker streamed. The Joker threatens the city with a bomb of all bombs behind him...again. The video was streamed live on Gotham News at 6pm for all of Gotham to see. The only thing he asked of me (this time) in order to save the city, was that I had to tell the whole world what we did in that shipping container closet, which he didn't specify, because 'that would take all the fun out of it for the readers', whomever they are.

I had replayed this several times, everything seemed normal, as if it were your usual abandoned warehouse. Until, I noticed the faint bubbling in the background, almost missing it. It was just like the bubbling I heard the second time I had fought an old masked villain, Red Hood. This isn't like water bubbling-no, it's a lot thicker, almost like syrup, with a small sizzle in between every few bubble. Acid.

Third POV

Batman lands on the glass rooftop of ACE chemicals, examining the area. A camera is set up with the Joker in front of it in his usual attire, a square, present-shaped bomb sitting behind him. The timer reads 1 minute and counting down. Batman swoops in without a second thought, landing on the back of The Joker, or what he thought was The Joker. Confused, Batman stumbles back to find that he has landed on a mannequin. Batman furrows his brows then rushes to the present shaped bomb and starts unscrewing the case. His fingers work like magic with the colour coded wires, dispite that they are colored in neon Sharpes. Batman manages to rewire the bomb, but the counter keeps going.
5
Batman somersaults away from the bomb.
4
He rolls behind a crate.
3
He shields himself with his armoured cape.
2
He braces for impact.
1

Party streamers fly into the air and the present box opens up, the smoke clears and Joker emerges out of the blue, from a giant 'puddin' pie, wearing nothing but purple metallic briefs (that reveals more about the Joker than Batman knew) and a smile, he starts to sing.

"🎵Happy Anniversary Batsy Bae,
You're really swell and ok,
It's almost 80 years to the da-a-ay,
Take the night off, let's play~🎵"

Batman just stares in disbelief, jaw dropped to the floor, eyes so wide they're practically popping out of their sockets.

"Speechless Bats? Let's just say I 'borrowed' this idea from Harley. Hey, at least something good came out of her, terrible cook that kid though. That's why this is my grandpa's recipe, grandpa Crane. See, as delicious as this is, I can't keep it all to myself, now can I? That would be extremely rude of me."

"What did you do Joker?" He just laughs.

"Remember how I'm basically immune to all the drugs they inject me with in Arkham? I've been feelin a little down lately. So, I asked grandpa Crane to 'boost the juice', and what do ya know? It's super effective on everybody but me, why? Because my body's so fucked up, you could hit me with a dozen horse tranquilizers and I'd be completely fine! So I thought, now what am I gonna do with all this juice? Why don't I make everyone my personal TV show! So, you know how there's that fish craze goin on? Omega three's and all that? Aaaaand he's gone."