Never Leave Me Alone

Chapter 8

I'm going to have to live with it. For the rest of my pathetic life.

I drove to the hospital sobbing. I thought and thought. Winter is never going to forgive me. I don't blame her. I walked in the hospital and sat in the waiting room.

*the next day*

I refused to sleep. The doctor almost had me escorted home. Almost, just keep that in mind. I clawed him to death and he left me alone after. What could I have done to help Winter? I know there was nothing. She would never listen to me.

I waited for the doctor... Or a different doctor to tell me Winter was going to be fine.

*2 days later*

I still haven't slept. Haven't eaten. Haven't gone home to change. No shower. Just cigarettes. Nothing else. The doctor has came to me with a few updates like, she's on the verge of dieing, Or she's died 2 while on the operating table. She's not gone. She'll come back. She always does. Don't ask how I know. Dillon hasn't slept either. He's drank, smoked and sniffed. That's all he's fond for 3 days. Austin's actually gone home slept, showered, and ate.

"Oliver, Dillon, Austin, Winter is in a coma. She should be out in about a month." The doctor said. I let my bomb off. I punched the walls, I yelled at myself, I sobbed, nothing came out of it but a broken hand. My hearts broken from what I made her do. I've killed myself mentally in my mind.

"Oliver, if you want you can see her... You seem to be the one who reacts most." The doctor said. I looked at Austin who, approved. Dillon yelled at him as I walked away with the doctor.

"I will be in in a little bit. You need to get x-rays on your hand." The doctor said.

"Okay.." I said. He smiled and left. I sat down next to a pale Winter. I loved her paleness. It makes me think of Snow White. I sobbed for a bit. Then I finally cleared my throught.

"Winter, what have I done...? Bull shit Oliver you know what you've done... I haven't been at home in a while.. Or 4 days to be exact. That first time I met you you punched me, I understand why. I hate myself too. I can't stand the fact that is told you I hoped you where bullied when you go to school. I went a little too far, and I'm sorry. I haven't eaten, slept, showered, or changed.. All I've done is smoked. I'm so sorry..." My voice trailed off. I sat in silence. No one to be here to care about my shacking body. I took Winters. Hand in mine never let go.

*2 months later*

Winter was still in the coma, though she was supposed to wake up a month ago. The doctor said its a surprise she lived. She is lucky. I eventually stopped crying but it had one flaw, I started cutting again. I also went home. I wasn't happy with life. I wasn't happy with myself. I've fallen asleep 4 times a month. And tomorrow was Winters birthday. It's finally December. I hope she wakes up in time. Dillon and I never made up for what I said. Another cut on my arm. I just hope she wakes up... She's all I have left of love... But I will never tell. Never. Love. It's not real...

But this love is..