Goodbye, Perfect

Five

Just FRIENDS

You maybe wondering as to what's my relationship with Ethan.

We're friends. Close friends. Best friends. Just FRIENDS.

But I had this thing for him since we were just in 1st year high school. No one really knows what I feel for him. I'm too good at it, hiding.

Four years. Four fckng years of having this feelings for him and yet no one knows. Even my two girl bestfriends.

Magkaibigan na kaming walo simula pre-school. Our parents were friends and we live in the same neigborhood too.

The Eight of us met at the park. May kanya-kanyang yayang dala. May kanya-kanyang laruan at pagkain. May ibat-ibang ugali but we clicked the moment we helped Trina get away from the kids bullying her. Bearing the same emotions and will of only wanting to help a kid get away from her bullies. We then talked and planned on what we will do the next time those bullies come back here.

From then on we then became friends, we had each others back. No one ever dared to touch us, especially not the bullies.

The boys would always protect us from any mean girls who would try to bully us. They were our shield and our confidante. They were sweet and very caring to the three of us.

Until one time, when we went to high school and I got separated from them kase nauna akong nag enroll I was somehow bullied by the guys in our classroom. They told me I was too serious and was too stiff. They tease me for being too perfect. They always say things to me. That's were Ethan came, he saved me from the bullies and even transfered to our section to protect me.

We were inseparable that time, since magkaklase kami and he was very sweet to me. He always brings me food, he spoils me a lot by giving into my whims. He's always there whenever I want to go the mall to buy books or if I want to go shopping.

Little did I know that I was falling for the gesture. I thought I was special. I thought he had feeling for me too.

But when we got into second year high school naging magkaklase kaming walo. Ethan and I kind of drifted a part because of this one girl na nagustohan niya, he courted her and that was a slap on the face that he had no romantic feelings towards me.

I was hurt but no one knew. I thought I'd move on from him. I wanted to wash the feelings aways since he's my friend and I promised myself that I would never fall for a close friend.

But here I am, magka college na pero kaseng strong parin ng diamond yung feelings ko for him.

How do you unlove a person who has been in your heart for the longest time?

How can the feelings fade when he's just right there, sending you mixed signals? Or maybe I am just assuming things.

How do I make the feelings go away?