Peter Parker Oneshots

Broken

Tears glide down Peter's eyes as he walks out of hell, other wise known as school. It was like everyone there had been against him, it was like the world was against him. He came out to bisexual to his friends and they started yelling at him, calling him horrible slurs. It was like a nightmare, but there was only one problem, he wasn't able to wake up. Which seemed like the worst thing in the world at the moment.

He didn't have anyone right now. All of the Avengers were on a mission, his parents, aunt, and uncle were dead. Peter's alone, so he can only turn to the one thing that will always be there for him...music. It's the one constant in his life, the one thing that can't be taken away from him. It's the thing that can comfort him even in the darkest of times. 

Once he got back to the tower he went up to the music room, he only goes there when everyone is on a mission. Peter walked over to the piano to start playing one of his favorite songs, not knowing that the Avengers were home, and walking towards where he was. Then, he started to sing.

"If you see the boy I used to be,

could you tell him that I'd like to find him?

And if you see the shell that's left of me,

could you spare him a little kindness?"

Peter thought back to when he was the happiest little kid on Christmas, waking up to his parents, aunt, uncle, everybody around. Back to when he got a bunch of presents, and didn't have to worry about the cost. All he wanted was to be that carefree again, he'd been pretending for so long. He's not even sure he's alive sometimes, he just feels empty now that May's gone. He's the only Parker left, and it hurts. Now everybody knows that he's bisexual, they hate him. All of his so called "friends" decided it would be best to throw him away, like he was some kind of broken toy that couldn't be fixed. Little did he know that all of the Avengers were there and listening to him.

"Cause I've been high and I've been low,

I've spent a thousand night's alone.

Tryna hold on tight."

Peter's had high points in his life, but he's had oh so many low points. Sometimes they're always low. He's been alone for so long, when his parents died he was alone. When Ben died he was alone, and now that May died he was alone too. May worked 24/7 he was always alone at their apartment. He was trying so hard to hold onto everything he loved, but they just kept slipping away.

"And feelings come but they won't go,

please won't someone take me home?

Before I lose my mind."

Peter gets attached to people too easily, so when they leave it hurts him. He can't change who he loves, it wasn't his choice. All he wants it to see his family again, they are his home. He just wants to see the apartment he grew up in, even if it's just one last time. It's driving him insane, he just needs to see it again.

"Am I broken?

Am I flawed?

Do I deserve a shred of worth,

or am I just another fake fucked up lost cause?"

Peter knew that there was something wrong with him, he felt it. He had to know if he was broken, but he already knew the answer. Everyone had been telling him that what he felt was a phase, and that he wasn't valid. Peter knows that everyone has their flaws, but he is convinced he has the most. He doesn't think he's worth anything, he's convinced he's just a broken, worthless orphan boy. He acts like he's happy and okay, but he's not. He knows he's messed up, he knows that he's lost. He doesn't want to be a charity case.

"And am I human?

Or am I something else?

Cuz I'm so scared and no one's there,

to save me from the nightmare I call myself."

Peter thinks he's not human at times, he thinks he's not normal, because he isn't. He's half spider, but it's who he loves that makes him feel like he's not human. It's because of the horrible words people say to him. He's scared of himself and what he'll do if he gives into the sadness, but nobody's there for him. They don't notice his cries for help. He thinks of himself and his life as a never ending funeral, his inner demons and nightmares having being haunting him too much and in all honesty he's ready to give in.

"I've tried everything and anything,

but nothing seems to quite work like it should.

Between the madness and the apathy,

seems there's nothing left inside of me that's good."

Peter's tried therapists, cutting, anything to escape his harsh reality. Anything to keep him away from the fact that he's alone. But nothing works, the pain doesn't stop. The tears don't stop flowing, the panic, the anxiety, the nightmares, the torture doesn't stop. It drives him insane that he can't stop, it makes him angry that he can't be normal.

"Cause I've been high and I've been low,

I've spent a thousand night's alone.

Tryna hold on tight.

And feelings come but they won't go,

please won't someone take me home?

Before I lose my mind.

Am I broken?

Am I flawed?

Do I deserve a shred of worth,

or am I just another fake fucked up lost cause?

And am I human?

Or am I something else?

Cuz I'm so scared and no one's there,

to save me from the nightmare I call myself."

He sings the chorus again, the feelings and thoughts rushing around in his head. The Avengers were already in tears, they were shocked that he could play the piano, they were so shocked because his voice was identical to an angels, but they were mostly shocked because the hadn't told them that he felt that way.

"Am I broken?

Am I flawed?

Do I deserve a shred of worth,

or am I just another fake fucked up lost cause?

And am I human?

Or am I something else?

Cuz I'm so scared and no one's there,

to save me from the nightmare I call myself."

Peter finishes off the song with tears streaming down his face and they quickly turned to sobs. He truly thought that he was alone in this world with nobody to turn too. The kid needed someone, anyone at this point. He just need to hug someone and he needed someone to tell him that everything would be okay, even if it was just a lie. He turned to get up, and when he did he saw all of the Avengers standing there sobbing.

"I d-didn't know y-you guys were h-home...I'm s-sorry. It's j-just I-" He was interrupted by his own sob and voice crack, and the Avengers started hugging him. Which squished him, since all of them were in some gigantic group hug with Peter in the middle. They kept telling him that it would be okay, and that they'd be here for him whenever he need them.

"Все в порядке, паук, у меня есть ты. Не забывайте, что вы действительны. Я люблю тебя, Питер. (It's okay baby spider, I've got you. Don't forget that you are valid. I love you, Peter.)" Natasha said in russian which only Peter, Bucky, herself, and Thor could understand. (Because Thor has All Speak. So he can speak any language) Peter nodded before hugging his new family tighter, he was too afraid to let go. But he knew that their family may be a little crazy, dysfunctional, different, but it was the furthest from perfect, but it was his.