Climax

Curiosity Made Carl Gay - 1

You need a brave heart to satisfy your curious mind. - Anonymous.

Carl

"I like you." He says, I think his name is Stewart or something.

I usually won't give much thought to such a declaration, but his face is red.. that red you get, when you realize you haven't zipped your pants back up, and a girl points it out, and for a second you wonder if you wore boxers that morning. That red.

It sets off alarm bells in my head.

"I'm a dude." I say. Harry, my brother would shake his head if he heard me. I have the worst communication skills.

Stewart gives a constipated look. "I know."

"I have a girlfriend," I say.

"I'm aware."

Now I'm confused. "Then why'd you say such a thing? On a Monday morning?"

He stares at me for a second and laughs.

"It'd have been okay if it was a Wednesday?" He asks, smiling, the red has receded a bit.

"No. Only Fridays. That's when you can prank. Mondays are serious business." I have Spanish. I hate Spanish. English is bad enough. But Mrs. Daniels makes us speak in Spanish. I stay as low as possible. It's very stressful.

"Listen.." He takes a deep breath. "I like you, I know you have a girlfriend, I know... It's just that I don't want to regret not saying it... I don't want to look back at my junior year and think, why didn't you tell him Terry? You should have, he might have said yes. Now you never know. I don't want that. So..." He trailed off.

Terry Stewart. He is in that science club, I take Fio to, on Thursdays.

And he likes me.

"Is it because I wear that pink shirt often? My sister, Fio bought it for me, I cannot not wear it.." I like that shirt. But no need to tell that and confuse him more.

Terry Stewart shakes his head, reminding me of my mom. She does it a lot, it means she's done with the discussion.

"No, nevermind. Forget I said anything. Bye, Carl." He struts off along the corridor.

If it's not the pink, why else would he think that way?

I'm not gay.

What's gay anyway?

****

Terry

"How did it go? I saw when you're talking to him." Brian whispers in my ear.

I shrug. "Embarrassing, humiliating. Never doing it again." I'd rather kiss a frog and wait for a miracle.

"Tell me the deets." Brian nudges.

Half listening to the teacher, I tell him the important bit of detail. "Like any het, he went like, is it my pink shirt?"

I love that pink shirt, it has cute little swans in the back and in the front a big balloon. It's not that bad pink that makes your eyes water. It's a pleasant pink.

"Hey, don't generalize, if it was me, I'd have been flattered. You're picky as fuck. His loss." We bump shoulders in silent agreement.

Yes, it's Carl's loss. But it's mine too. I like him. So much. He is supposed to be in senior year, he is repeating last year -and attends classes with us juniors now. If he had gotten decent grades our paths would have never crossed. I'd have been blissfully unaware of his existence.

It hurts, the one time I made my utmost effort to express my feelings, it's not received well. I had this hope, a tiny hope that you can't kill how much ever you try. He is maybe bi. He's maybe secretly interested in me. Granted, it is far-fetched hope. Still a hope, a fairytale one.

So I risked humiliation and told him but he said no. It's over. Now I can move on. Forget his rugged looks, contrasting sweet voice and totally unimaginable cute personality.

I'm done. No more wet dreams featuring Carl Stimson, in his pink shirt and nothing else.

*****End of Chapter One*****