Pain and Recovery

The hospital

Normal
Thoughts
Destructive thoughts

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Viktor's P.O.V

Yuuri, I love you.
The drive behind the ambulance felt like it took hours and I was begging I lose my patience. "Why is it taking so long to get to the fucking hospital?" I shouted towards no one in particular. Please don't die, Please.

Time skip (1 week later)

It's been a week. Why hasn't he woken up yet!!! Why is he still hooked up to all these monitors?!?! Why? Why? Why? These have been the only thoughts in my head sense this morning. Yuuri was still in the hospital unconscious sense the incident that had happened last week. The doctors said it was normal but I just can't stand the wait any longer. I haven't left this room other than for food and the bathroom sense he first got to the room. This past week has been so draining and Yuri was here but I sent him back to Russia right after the incident. I couldn't stand him being here saying demeaning things about Yuuri, so I yelled at him and may have accidentally slapped him across the face. The next day he was already halfway back to Russia by the time I had woken up. I highly doubt me and Yuuri will be able to compete in the GPF this year. I will have to help him with recovering from this, he needs to know that he is loved, I just hope that I can give that to him.

Yuuri's P.O.V

Why do I feel so heavy? Beep beep beep beep. What is that sound? Why can't I move? I start panicking and the beeping sound gets quicker and louder. Suddenly I hear "Yuuri?! Yuuri it's okay. Your fine. Just breathe for me please try. Just try please calm down." I could feel myself calming ever so slightly. Viktor? Is that you? I try to open my eyes but I just can't. Why is it so hard? I slowly open my eyes wincing as the bright lights blind my tired eyes. Immediately after I flinch from the pain in my arms and on my stomach. After the pain calms some I try again to open my eyes, this time I actually do get them open and see Viktor's worried face really close to mine. I want to kiss him. But I control myself because I know he doesn't like me back what so ever. That is until I feel a pair of lips against mine, my eyes widening even wider than I thought possible. He kissed me!! He fucking kissed me!!!!!! I mentally screamed. But I winced shortly after. Viktor noticed this too and asked "are you okay? Where's the pain?" Then he pressed a buzzer that was above my head that I couldn't see. Shortly after a tall doctor came in introducing himself as Dr. Krow. He stated what had happened over the coarse of the week and that Viktor never left my side unless he absolutely had to. He then gave me a little bit of morphine to ease the pain and told me that I would be able to leave tomorrow but that I would need to go to regularly scheduled therapy sessions. After he left I turned to Viktor who was smiling at me happily. That smile changed to a slight frown when he sees my expression. "Will you abandon me sense you now know about this habit of mine just like everyone else?" He looked at me shocked, then his face turned into determination and he said. "I will never abandon you Yuuri, I won't do what others have done to you. Yuuri wether you believe me or not I really care about you and want to stick by your side for as long as you'll have me." He said with the most sincere smile I have ever seen. I just smile back at him and ask for a hug which he happily obliged. When we separated Viktor had a serious look.

Viktor's P.O.V

Now I can finally ask why he did everything he did. "Yuuri, why did you do it?" I started off quietly. He simply stated that "it was a pain relief." "How so when you just cause yourself more pain from it in the first place?" I asked. "That's..... that's kinda the point...... the pain." My heart went cold at that. "Why did you do it this time what had triggered it?" He looked away and out the window and quietly said "because I didn't feel like I deserved to live." I gave him a hug after that and started to cry because that was the saddest thing I had heard that he thought he just did deserve to live. I will prove to him that he is worthy of living and that he isn't a person no one wants to be around. That I love him. I watch as Yuuri slowly falls asleep due to the pain killers that Dr. Krow had given him. I slowly fall into a restful sleep as well finally knowing that Yuuri is okay.