Nature's Prudence // {McLennon}

In the Course of Dawn

"This grand show is eternal. It is always sunrise somewhere; the dew is never dried all at once; a shower is forever falling; vapor is ever rising. Eternal sunrise, eternal dawn and gloaming, on sea and continents and islands, each in its turn, as the round earth rolls."

Paul 

 It was as though my body refused to let me rest. The entire night consisted of me stroking the boy's palms lovingly, admiring every cell, basking in all the sensations his skin had to offer. You'd think that I would immediately drift off, being presented the most soul nourishing bed after such an extended time of sleeping on the floor. I did feel tired, exhausted and very overwhelmed, but it still wasn't happening. I know that the fastest way to sleep is to quit trying to sleep, to quit grabbing hold of water lest I drown. The easiest way to attain sleep is to let go, but that was surprisingly too challenging. 

 The beige curtains were dancing and swaying due to the slight crack in his room's window. I knew that I wasn't going to sleep anytime soon, so with a huff, I let go of his hand and bit my lower lip. You know when you wish to get up, but there's a force tugging down at you, inviting you to stay glued to your bed? That was an issue I found myself facing, especially since I've never had a fallen angel lie down next to me before. 

 I can't stay, I'll probably do something stupid and irrational if I chose to do so, keeping in mind that the idea of slumber jumped off of the balcony long ago. Choosing to let John's soft snores play with my eardrums, I sat up and placed both of my hands on each side of the bed. I stared at the floor for a while and smiled, still very baffled and mystified at the fact that I now had a home. 

 My warm feet touched the cold pavement, sending shivers up my spine. I attempted to blink the tiredness away and wrapped my palm around the golden handle, gently pushing it downwards whilst glimpsing back at him to make sure that he wasn't phased. I left cautiously and shut the door behind me, the nightly silence was so nice that it immediately put me into a trance-like state. 

 I walked down to the kitchen, trying my hardest not to trip over due to the darkness. I let my hand roam around the wall right by the doorframe a bit until I sensed a light switch. I switched the light on and yelped involuntarily at the painful sensitivity of my eyes upon the sudden light exposure. After closing them down a bit, and then gradually opening them and taking my time at adjusting, I dragged my feet to the sink, grabbing a cup and making some coffee. Directing my full attention to whatever I was doing, no matter how small, and taking lots of interest in it and focusing on the brilliant movements and gestures that I had mechanically gotten used to over the years was very relaxing. I never seem to understand why, but the sight of my pouring some coffee in a cup and stirring it until it looked clear seemed to hypnotize me. 

 I didn't like cups with handles, I loved the feel of my hand against the cup, no matter how hot the beverage inside was. I loved being a part of what I was going to be drinking even before it enters my body. 

I left the kitchen and went outside for a bit, finding a plastic chair and then sitting on it comfortably. The sun would soon start to rise, and there was no way I was missing out on that. The sky seemed to be at its darkest at this time, which was beautifully ironic to me. The sky is at its darkest right before the peak of dawn.  

 I heard a soft whisper behind me, as my head immediately snapped backwards. John was standing there, and there was something in the way he looked that made me feel like I was on the verge of passing out. 

 "Care to watch the sunrise with me?" I smiled, trying to keep my voice soft and quiet. 

He stared at me for a while and then raised an eyebrow, letting out a lengthy yawn before grabbing the nearest chair and setting it down next to me.