Zonnique.
After my break down in the middle of the street, Chres decided to take me to his house, but all I could think about was Bre… Breezy, Bre Bear… Sunshine… my ray of sunshine… once I saw that white sheet I completely shut down… she's gone and so was her unborn daughter, my niece… I stared out the window and thought about everything. This morning when I called her out about her pregnancy , that was supposed to be a secret, but of course blabbermouth blu can't shut the fuck up, when I ditched her every week because of a hangover… I hated my life as of now… a life without Bre, was a living hell.
"Hey… Niquey… " Chres said , shaking me out of my train of thoughts. I just looked at him and started biting my nails, I didn't wanna have small talk I just wanted to sit in a steaming hot shower to wash the pain away.
"We're here… " he said softly, he just got out and walked into the Apartment Complex, leaving me in the silent car… thinking… tears streaming down my face.
"Goddamn It… why me… why" I mumbled out, my voice was shaking and so was my body… my whole fucking body. I got out the car and started walking down to the local liquor store, pale lights were plastered all over the ceiling, I walked up to the light skinned man at the counter. "Whole bottle of vodka please. " I mumbled, just looking at my red nails, that Bre painted.
"how old are you? " the man asked licking his lips, including that black cut beard on his chin.
"just give me the fucking bottle man. " I snapped, pulling out my 10 dollars slapping it on the counter, filled with different stickers.
"Alright, alright.. " he threw his hands up, and handed me the bottle .I stared at him for a while and walked off popping the top and taking my first swig of the strong, yet tasteful drink . I walked back to the Apartment and knocked on chres' door softly, since I was a little tipsy I thought it was louder .
"Chresanto open the fucking door, damnit! " I screeched.
He swung the door open with bloodshot eyes, Bre was Chres' stepsister, they were close and now that she was dead... he had no family.
"Get the hell in here. " he looked at me in disgust, and grabbed my arm snatching me inside.
"Ow! " I giggled
He snatched the bottle out of my hand and threw it across the room causing it to break, I jumped slightly.
"Fuck is wrong with you!? " he shouted
"Fuck is wrong with you!? " I repeated pushing him away.
"Zonnique! You're… " he started
"eighteen! " I shouted, walking away.
"still in highschool.. " he said blankly.
I felt myself tear up once again, my eyes burnt and my breathing quicken… that was another sensitive subject I hate talking about.
"You dropped out! at least my ass is still fucking trying! what the fuck are you doing besides living off that skank bitch you call a girlfriend !? Don't ever in yo god giving life bring up. my fucking education ! As long as I live! " I stomped into the bathroom, slamming the door. I turned on the shower and didn't bother taking off any clothes, I just laid there and let the steaming hot water hit me as I sobbed loudly.
everything went downhill for me.
I wanted to end my life.
I wanted to die.
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