His Moonchild

26

Irene's POV

"I love you..."

The moment I heard what he said, I had to turn around, clutching my chest in instant.

Fuck. I know it would hurt but I didn't know it would hurt like this. It was like I was hit by a truck and the impact was too strong. Seeing Namjoon so broken and hearing how much he still loves her breaks me.

I feel so bad that Kaizan was gone and I honestly can't get enough sleep these past months because I think about her... him...the pain their hearts harbor.

Kaizan and I never met but how can she say those words to me? How can she tell me to take care of him when she's out there, the person he loves the most, now gone?

This is so unfair.

Damn. If I knew I'd literally get hurt like this, I shouldn't have come here.

I was about to take another step away from him when I heard him speak once again.

"Don't leave..."

Startled, I turned around and saw him turned to my direction. He must have heard the sound of my heavy footsteps.

Shit.

An awkward smile escaped on my lips.

"Come here Joohyun. I haven't seen you for so long..." he whispered. His voice hoarse but to me, it felt like it was broken.

Slowly, I walked straight next to him, my hands over the rails for support. I honestly can't trust my knees and legs at this point.

"I've been quite busy too," I answered.

We were both silent for a moment, our eyes focused on the city lights before us.

I wish life can be these easy where I can stand next to the person I love and not think about anything else. Not think about tomorrow or the pain we both feel.

There are different kinds of pain, I'm aware of that. And that makes us human. But is it so delusional of me to think about my happiness first even though someone is in pain?

"How are you holdin' up..." I asked, breaking the silence between us. My grip tightened over the railings, I can honestly hear the loud beating of my heart.

I heard him chuckle and I can't help but look at his direction. His laugh, it changed. It wasn't the same as I use to hear whenever we try to hangout. Before I was able to stop myself, I called his name.

"Namjoon..." I can't help but whisper.

He shakes his head in response and watched the stars above.

"They called you here, huh,"

It wasn't a question but a statement. And I don't have the strength to lie to him.

"I'm making them worry, I know," he added. His voice was shaking and it's breaking me.

If I can take even just a little of his pain, I would.

"I'm trying Joohyun..." he whispered. It's very obvious how he had been bottling everything up.

"I'm trying but it's fucking hard. It's so hard I'm not even sure if this is still living..." and like that night, I saw tears streaming down his cheeks.

I turned my head to the opposite direction.

Don't cry Joohyun. Don't cry or he'll feel bad too.

My hand tightened on the rail even more.

He was crying, and I how he was trying so hard not to make a sound.

Why? Why does he have to be in pain like this?

I lifted my gaze on the sky, my faith questioning my sanity.

I've given him up. Why do you have to take away the person who's keeping him alive?

I heard him take a deep breath and I know it's getting harder for him to keep it together.

Fuck it.

Before I can even stop myself, I turned to his direction, my hand reaching for his arm, and with all the courage that is left in me, I pulled him closer and engulfed him in a hug.

I wasn't prepared for the impact but his reflexes were fast enough to keep us both in place.

I felt him try to back away a little but I stopped him. I pulled him closer and have my arms wrapped around him. His body stiffened but that didn't stop me.

"Cry..." I whispered. "Cry on my shoulders and I'll cry my problems too. It's a win-win thing. Cry away your pain and I'll do the same. Let's celebrate the cruelty of the world together..." I told him and I released a sigh.

Like him, I'm barely holding it in.

This is breaking me too.

The next thing I knew, his body relaxed a little and I felt his arms wrapped around me too. His chin now resting on my shoulder and my eyes closed in instant.

If this was a different case, I would be ecstatic to be in his arms. But it wasn't.

He was holding on me for his dear life and I took it all. I can hear him cry and I did the same.

I was crying. I was crying for all the pain, for his pain.

I was crying for my unrequited love. Because I know, even if Kaizan was gone, Namjoon will always be hers and she will never leave his heart.

So let's cry together Namjoon. Let's both cry our pain.