12am | Jinmin

12:00am

He couldn't get a wink of sleep. Seokjin's been turning and tossing all over the bed, trying to get comfortable without hearing his heartbeat ringing in his ears. Frustrated, the blonde gave a huff before laying on his back, looking at the shorter male beside him that was sleeping peacefully. He envied how Jimin could sleep throughout all the chaos his head is in— was he the only one raging?

"Jimin." Seokjin whispered, slightly nudging the raven that cradled him.

"Mm?"

"I can't sleep, just talk to me now, since we're being so honest with each other and not lying anymore." The blonde said, sitting up.

"Okay." Jimin answered, sitting up as well and taking the taller male's hands in his. He thought for a while, trying to get his mind running— it wasn't exactly easy to make sentences after sleeping for almost three hours. The raven cleared his throat, "when you told me your feelings and what's been going on, hyung, I was scared. I couldn't dilly dally around any longer because from what you told me, you can slip out of my hands at any point of time. No warnings, no goodbyes, just sudden disappearance— like you didn't even exist. I'm scared of that, hyung."

"You're important to me— so much more than you know. It's not even admiration or idolization anymore. I love you, hyung. I love you so much that you're constantly on my mind, I want you to be the happiest you've ever been, to see you smiling all the time. I kissed you not because you were vulnerable, but because it might the last chance to change your mind. When this night passes, I'm afraid I won't be able to see you— permanently."

Jimin paused for a while, his breathing deep.

"I wanted you to know that I'm yours to keep, that you would have a reason to keep fighting and going on. I'm here for you, hyung. Romantically or not, you can always count on me to pull you up— to be your safe haven. I could be the pillar that you always needed, but I also want you to be your own light."

"You don't have to suffer alone anymore, hyung." The raven ended, his eyes glistening in the dark.

Seokjin's heart was beating so hard against his chest, he was afraid it'll pop out. The hands that were holding his was shaking, Jimin's eyes looking at his face for any uncertainty.

"Jimin—"

"I love you hyung. I don't want to let you go. I don't want you to disappear. Please treasure your life more, don't throw yourself away." The raven sobbed, finally launching himself to his hyung's arms. He wrapped his arms around the blonde and tucked his head at the hollow of his neck; arms squeezing tightly.

There's no way Seokjin can sleep even if he got the explanation he wanted.

"I'm— I'm not going anywhere, Jimin." The blonde whispered softly, combing his fingers through the shorter male's dark locks.

"You were thinking of it, you almost got out of my grasp!"

"But now I have a reason not to." Seokjin said calmly.

"I'm going to be selfish with you, hyung. I don't want you to go. Please stay with me, move in with me, be there with me everyday." Jimin begged, a hint of urgency in his voice as he shook his balled up fists against the blonde's back.

Seokjin released a sigh, a painful smile on his face, "all these times I thought I was alone but you were silently watching me, weren't you? I thought that I could disappear without a trace since all of us fell apart—"

"You never left my mind, hyung. Not even once." The raven admitted, eyes beginning to feel rusty as he slurred his words.

"Let's sleep, hm?"