.:Slasher One-Shots:.

👻 Beetlejuice:. Brownie Points

Category:. Fluff

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Normal people were in relationships with living, breathing beings who were somewhat sane.

Fortunately (or unfortunately, we aren't sure), your family wasn't normal, and neither was your relationship with a certain pale, buggy, ghosty freak named Betelgeuse (or Beetlejuice for simplicity's sake and because you thought it was funny) who was not exactly the picturesque boyfriend but hey, you thought his jokes were charming at least.

Currently, you were home alone, your cousin Lydia and her parents were back in New York for Aunt Delia's new showcase of artwork which just so happened to be based around the ghost with the most. You both wanted to go, it would've been perfect for your first anniversary, but Beets had "forgotten" to get his Travel Pass to go, so unless he wanted to be eaten by a giant striped snake thingy, it was no dice. You just told the family you were sick so they didn't feel too bad.

But, if Beetlejuice was with you, then why were you still all alone? Well to put it simply, the Bug-Of-The-Hour had some business to attend to in the Netherworld, he refused to say what and you didn't pry.

So, here you were. All alone. Baking a big-ass brownie as a small celebration of an entire year surviving puns, sexual jokes, and non-stop attempts (and successes) into your pants.

You worked quickly around the kitchen, preheating the oven, melting the butter, and making sure everything was all set to mix and bake and all that good jazz. The radio in the background was playing the sweet and rocking rhythms of Killer Queen by Queen, which made you feel like the Marie Antoinette of Brownies, let's just be honest here. Of course, you were so busy pouring the batter into the pan you didn't notice the striped figure leaning against the door from the kitchen, watching your every movement silently. It was only when you felt arms snake around you as you closed the oven, having just put the brownie in, that you realized the ghost man had arrived.

"Hi baby," you greeted, turning around in Beetlejuice's arms to face him, planting a small kiss on his lips. "How was the meeting with the Netherworld?" Beets kissed your neck, which earned a giggle out of you, before releasing you out of his arms and hopping up on one of the only clean counters in the kitchen.

"How it always is babes, creepy, dark, and hey, full-a-dead people," he chuckled as you set off to clean up the mess you had made. "Now you, you made the kitchen look like a tornado swept through here, are we not in Kansas anymore, Toto?" He began to laugh more full-heartedly at his joke while you simply rolled your eyes, throwing a crumpled napkin his way.

"If you're going to make fun of me, I'll eat the brownie all on my own," Smirking you turned your back to the dead deviant intending to focus on the dishes in the sink, but no sooner had you turned on the faucet did you feel a sudden sting on your ass. With a gasp you turned around, seeing Beetlejuice with a cheeky grin on his face, retracting his extended arm.

"That's alright babes, I like cake anyway," he teased licking his lips.

With a playful huff, you made quick work of cleaning the dishes, Beets throwing a one-liner at you every once in a while and before long it was time to take out the long-awaited pastry. You pulled on your oven mitts and carefully pulled out the pan, hurridly placing it on the oven top to cool. You smiled proudly and turned to the smirking Poltergeist, who was still perched on the countertop.

"So-" you rested your crossed arms on his legs- "What Rated PG-13 thing can we do while we wait for the brownie to cool?" You raised your eyebrows at Beetlejuice and he mulled over exactly what to do. After a few seconds, you let out a dramatic sigh, "Are all your ideas Rated R? It shouldn't take this long you know," you mimicked his earlier teasing tone, which resulted in a goofy glare from the ghost.

"Well, why don't we just dance to this crappy music? We'll be like Casper and Wendy in that one movie," He mocked.

"A truly interesting idea, I mean I did always think the actor who played human Casper was super cute, I dunno if you'd be able to compete," You placed your hands on your hips, taking a step back from the now slightly irritated Bug. You shrugged, leaning on the opposite counter, crossing your arms again. Beetlejuice jumped off the counter and made his way over to you.

"I'm wounded babes, absolutely wounded," he huffed wrapping his arms around your waist and beginning to pepper kisses across your neck. You giggled, placing your arms around his neck, and starting to play with his hair, he responded with a small sigh.

"You're being oddly gentle tonight, Beets, what's the occasion?" You muttered, enjoying the attention you were receiving. Beetlejuice was one to take what he wanted when, you were consenting of course, so him being gentle was a very rare feat. He kissed your jaw before pulling away, much to your disappointment.

"If you want it rough you just gotta say so, doll," He grinned, earning an eye roll from you. You slipped out of his grasp and made your way to the brownie pan, checking its temperature and finding it to be perfect.

"You sir, are a fruitcake," you chided, plopping the brownie onto a serving plate and going to the freezer to fish out the ice cream you had bought to go along with the treat.

"I'm legendary and delicious?"

"What planet do you live on where fruit cake is good?" You scooped out a perfect ball of Ice cream and placed it carefully on the brownie. You returned it to its place in the freezer and glided around Beetlejuice and his hurt expression to retrieve some spoons. "Now hurry up and sit down before I eat this thing all by myself."

We both sat at the dinner table, taking a spoonful of the dessert, Beetlejuice took his bite first.

"Wow, this is way better than chewing on a dog," He muttered, his eyes lighting up. You said a small thank you, as you took a bite yourself. If happiness was food, it would be this. You smiled to yourself, proud that you had accomplished something like baking so easily, even with your distractions.

"I need to keep you forever, just to make me this all the time," Beetlejuice exclaimed as we finished eating. "On a scale of one to ten, how bad of an idea would it be for us to get married?"

You figured he was joking, and deciding to match his seemingly sarcastic tone, you replied, "Off the charts, let's do it."

This caught him off guard, and he turned around, muttering to himself before turning back to you with a goofy grin, he reached his hand out beckoning you to give him your right hand to which you obliged. He pulled out a velvet black box, and opened it, seeing the teary look on your face he rapidly began to explain.

"Don't worry babes this isn't a true engagement ring, just a promise. Think of it as a down payment on a car for the future," he exclaimed, showing you the ring. It was silver, white and black jewels were embedded all around the simple ring in a strip pattern similar to Beetlejuice's jacket. "I know it's kind of a big decision, I mean I always said if I ever did it'd only be once and that was it. This little guy was the reason I had a meeting with the Nether-Worst, I'm trying to do things right this time." He claimed, referring to before you two had met and he had attempted to marry Lydia.

Your eyes flicked from his to the ring, your mouth agape, before finally answering.

"I...okay, yeah, let's be engaged to be engaged. Put the downpayment down." He chuckled at your response and finally placed the ring on your finger, before gently kissing it.

"Now I know why you were being so gentle, you were trying to earn brownie points," you teased, sticking your tongue out.

"Don't get used to it babes-" Beetlejuice picked you up bridal style -"cause tonight you're all mine." He chuckled making his way up the stairs to your bedroom.

Brownie points were earned that night.

Lots,

And lots,

Of brownie points.