Merlin Imagines

Regrets Chapter 2

"I can't believe he's gone!"

"I know, the castle seems so dull without Mer—"

"Shh! Don't say it! You know how the King gets." The servants were quietly chatting amongst themselves as they went about their day. It had been two months since Merlin's banishment, and life in Camelot wasn't getting easier. It was plain to see that the kingdom was in a depression, which had begun the moment Merlin had crossed Camelot's borders. The servants were interrupted when a lone figure shuffled into the room. The servants quietly watched as Gaius shuffled to a set of drawers on the other side of the kitchen. He opened the top drawer and slowly shuffled its contents around, before pulling out a bundle of dried herbs. He tucked the herbs away closed the door, and shuffled back out of the kitchen. If he didn't drag his feet, no one would've even noticed his presence. He looked like a ghost. His hair was unkempt, his clothes dull and dreary, and he looked three times as old as he actually was. He refused to talk to anyone, and it was plain to see that Merlin's leaving was taking its toll on the physician. But it seemed to be taking a toll on the court too. The King had become more irritable, and it didn't take much to invoke his wrath. Queen Guinivere had become withdrawn in her grief, and she barely spoke to anyone. The knights had become...duller. There were no more pranks, no more spur-of-the-moment- quests. They hardly ate dinner together anymore.

Until today.

When Gaius expressed a desire to eat dinner with the monarchs and the knights, they had all jumped at the opportunity, mostly because they feared he would waste away if he isolated himself for much longer. When the day's work was done, the knights, Arthur, Gwen, and Gaius had gathered at the round table, picking at their food. There was a long moment of silence before anyone spoke.

"I was thinking..." Gaius' voice cracked and wheezed from disuse.

"Yes, Gaius?" Gwen asked quietly.

"It's awfully different without Merlin here, isn't it?" The tension in the room skyrocketed. Arthur's hands clenched into fists, but he said nothing. "I wonder how he's doing," Gaius continued.

"Gaius, I know you miss him," Arthur said softly. "But the law is the law."

"But the penalty for using magic is death. If everything is so set in stone, why was an exception made for Merlin?" No one spoke. "Forgive me for speaking out of turn, but you said yourself Camelot would be a place of equality for all. Yet a man who has done nothing but good for the kingdom was expelled without a second thought?" None of them had ever seen Gaius so passionate, and it unsettled each and every one of them. "Crooks and vagabonds are thrown in the dungeon and then are allowed to remain in the kingdom. If you ask me, what happened to Merlin was a gross miscarriage of justice, and you should be ashamed of yourself for turning your back on your friend so quickly!" Gaius ended hi rant and stood up. "Thank you for the meal." He said gruffly, before leaving the room. The knights, Arthur, and Guinevere all looked at each other.

"...Maybe he's right," Gwen said at last. Arthur turned to his wife in astonishment. She met his gaze. "Merlin could've hurt any of us at any given moment, you especially, and it would've been easy for him to get out of the stocks, but he didn't. I know you've had bad experiences with magic, but it doesn't mean all magic is bad."

"But Morgana has magic, and look at what's happened."

"But Mordred's a druid," Gwen fired back. "And he's a loyal member of your guard."

"Magic killed my father." He said bluntly.

"But that same magic attempted to save him."

"Look, I can't let Merlin come back, alright?"

"Why not?"

"Because it's what my father would have wanted! I swore to him I'd run the kingdom in a way he would!"

"This isn't his kingdom!" Gwen shouted. "It's your kingdom! And if you continue to act like someone you're not, then you will run this kingdom into the ground." She threw her napkin down on the table and fled the room. The room was thrust into silence once again.

"Well?" Arthur said gruffly. "Anyone else want to challenge my decision?" No one moved. "Leave me, he said at last." The knights got up and bowed before leaving the room. Arthur let out a long sigh and walked over to the window. He gazed out over his kingdom as he became lost in thought.

You did what you had to do. Merlin broke the law. Multiple times, apparently. But I can't deny that I thought of him a friend. One of my closest friends. And the minute I learned something new about him, I treated him like a stranger. Just one little detail, and...oh God, what have I done?

"Send for Gaius." He ordered a guard. He nodded and walked away. A few minutes later he came back with the physician in tow.

"Yes, Your Majesty?" Gaius asked quietly.

"You wouldn't happen to know where Merlin went, do you?"

"...May I ask what this is about?"

"I...I fear I've made a horrible mistake." Gaius didn't say anything, and Arthur continued. "I abandoned a friend just because he was different than me, and I wish to make amends." Gaius smiled. "Will you help me?"

"I would be honoured, Your Majesty." Arthur smiled.

"Thank you Gaius." He snapped his fingers and a servant appeared. "Send for my Knights. We're bringing Merlin home." He began to walk away.

"Your Majesty?" He stopped.

"Yes, Gaius?" He asked impatiently.

"...Perhaps you'd like to know where Merlin is?" Arthur's face turned pink.

"...That would make things easier." He admitted quietly. Gaius chuckled. "Well are you going to tell me or not?"

"He went home, Your Majesty. To Ealdor."

"Well what are we waiting for? Let's go!" He swept out of the room, leaving Gaius alone with his newfound hope.