The Undoing of My Reality [UNDOING I]

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It took me a week to get accustomed to camp half blood. After I had chosen my weapon, I was sent to the big house to get told the rules, meet Chiron and Dionysus, and chug diet coke. (against Oliver's dismay. He hated diet coke.) For a week straight, I slept soundly. I didn't have my brothers FPS games blasting through my wall at high volumes. I didn't have to worry about my dad. I, for once in my life, felt safe.

Almost too safe.

Eventually my thoughts began to run wild. What if my dad was alive? What if that cop was lying and I was being tricked? What if my brother tries to find me? Where's my mom? Who is my mom, and why did she leave me with Allen? (my brother's dad)
One more question plagued my mind for that time:

Why did my dad do nothing to stop him?

He could have done something. Put him in a coma. Make him pass out when he was about to beat me. Anything could have been done, but no. No instead I had to take matters into my own hands.

I was up late thinking about it, pacing my cabin thoughtfully. I had woken up from a rather graphic dream involving Allen and his death, one that I hated to admit I enjoyed. I looked towards the statue on my dad on top of the fireplace.

"Why?" I asked, to no one in particular. I wasn't mad. I was disappointed. Confused. Sad, even. "Why did you just stand there?" I could hear my voice crack, I could feel my lip quiver. I couldn't be there, in that cabin. I needed fresh air. I wouldn't get an answer. I grabbed my walkman and my headphones, and plugged myself in. Thank gods Leo fixed it, I'm pretty sure I would have chucked it into hell if it buffered again. I threw on my hoodie, which I hadn't touched in a week. It reminded me of home, and I hated home. But it was cold, and as a cold person, I couldn't take more cold. I didn't even register I still had barium in the pocket.

I stepped outside to the fresh air. Late october is when it starts to get chilly around these parts. I walked towards the woods, I figured a change of scenery would do good for me. I followed the shorter grass, the ones more stepped on. I wasnt focusing on the time, or how long I was gone. All I could focus on was the cool air, warm colored leaves, the music in my ears, and the dark woods.

I passed by bunker 9 and a part of me wanted to drop by and just hang out. I knew Leo was awake, because he gave me my walkman at four AM the day after I met him. (which was embarrassing; because I had just taken a shower and had a facemask on. I couldn't stop blushing from embarassment)

The socially anxious part of me told me that I shouldn't, he's busy with the dragon. What was his name again? Hiccup? Festival? Letlus? I snapped myself out of my thoughts and kept walking, trying to ignore the heat in my face. Why was I blushing? At the time, I had no idea. But looking back, this is around the time I began to develop an infatuation for him, But that's not until later.

Eventually, I reached the lake. I hadn't seen it before, but I knew it was there. I also knew I wouldn't run into anyone here, because Percy values his sleep, as I learned from befriending Annabeth. I sat down at the docks, which creaked from wood rot. A part of me warned me not to sit down, but I did anyway. I swung my legs, my feet inches from the water. The water was normally crystal clear, but it was dark, and the moon reflecting off of the waves stopped me from seeing in. I kind of wanted to jump in, but the rational side of me was like um??? You're 5'2, that's five feet deep water, you can't swim, and it's 55 degrees.
My music was at the perfect pace. It was chill, and I felt like I could finally relax.

And then I felt eyes on me. Watching me. I hated the feeling of being watched, it reminded me of Allen. It gave me the creeps. I pulled one headphone away from my ear. Nothing. Just crickets. This only caused me to relax slightly. I visibly untensed my shoulders, and laid down on the dock with my eyes closed, legs still dangling. When I opened them, I was met with the mischevious eyes of Leo.
God. Fucking dammit. Could a girl ever get some peace around here? No. Is she too much of a pushover to tell him to go away? Absofuckinglutely.